this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2025
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I hate to break it to you, but unicorns aren't real because horses aren't real.
What????? Then what are all those horsecock dildos shaped after??????
This is just false and you know it. I play enough chess to have seen horseys first hand. If you only play online chess, you are forgiven for not realizing but once you take the pieces into your hand, you know all of them are real.
Maybe you confuse it with birds. Birds were real but went extinct like all the other dinosaurs. Modern "birds" are governmental drones. Giraffes btw are mythical creatures but horses and unicorns are real.
A corollary of the famous Eye-Mirror Principle by modern philosopher J. Christopher Smith