this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2025
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The Shitpost Office

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[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 21 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Old friend had me crying. He was in a customer's shitter and laid a dump so huge and solid it wouldn't flush. Wasn't flooding, just wouldn't break up and go down. So he opens the bathroom window and chunked it in their bushes.

That was 30-years ago and I have not laid such a dump to this day. I am in awe of that man.

[–] Dragonborn3810@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago

similar story: My friend is also known for laying absolute beastly shits, once he was at my house, having met a few other friends for the first time, took a shit so big it wouldnt flush. Came into the room and sheepishly asked for a plunger, which turned out to be too wide to fit into the bottom of the toilet. I proceeded to hand him a rubber glove, which he used to pick up and smush the beast into a smaller, more flushable item. It worked, it was recorded, we refer to it as "the video." And never need more context other than that phrase. In the years past I still can't look at that toilet the same way...l

[–] miss_demeanour@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

A pocket poop knife wudda done the trick.

[–] cm0002@piefed.social 7 points 3 days ago

It appears poop knife will forever transcend all platforms lmao

[–] androidul@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

absolute legend 🤣