Hi
Idk why I'm posting this tbh. Because I'm not sure if there's anything I can even do that will help.
There's just a combination of shit that keeps piling up and I can't seem to find a solution to any of it.
First of all I work full time and as of this summer I no longer make enough money to stay alive. I've been working for the better part of 2 decades and I haven't saved any money. I live extremely frugally, i just haven't been able to increase my pay at all for almost 5 years now and inflation has caught up. I can't get my work to give me more money, i can't find another job that will hire me for more, and I'm not poor enough to qualify for government assistance.
I am a trans person living in the United States, as somebody who is required to understand US politics for survival I see the country going in a really bad direction right now. Americans are domesticated slaves and most of them don't even realize giving away 5/7ths of your life to just barely not starve to death and die of exposure is a scam. And there's even fewer Americans who understand the history of fascist movements and what is happening in our country. It just feels like everyone in my life is taking crazy pills and sleepwalking to their deaths, my coworkers, my parents...
Also this year I have lost what little work life balance I had, i can no longer telework despite me not needing to be at a physical location to do any work, the commute, and the cost of the commute along with inflation were enough to push me into the red financially and mentally.
And none of this even touches on me not being allowed to meet a single milestone in my life, i have come to terms with me never owning a home, but I also will never be able to safely and responsibly raise children, and that's a really hard pill to swallow. It just feels like I am still a child myself, like I haven't ever gotten the chance to have any major responsibilities or power at all, and i never will.
When do I get to start my life?
It really feels like I'm waiting around to die, if I don't get shot by a fascist or put in a camp I will become homeless and die within 4 years like the majority of homeless people do. And if none of that happens, I'm still working until I die...
It feels like my only hope is to escape the United States, but I am a low skilled worker (IT) and poor so no country wants me. I can't afford to go to college again either.
So i guess, is there any way out of this cycle? Has anyone found a place I can try to move to where life won't feel like a waste of time?
I just don't know what to do anymore.
The US has expertly constructed a system where the few ways that you could theoretically increase your class would also lead to a complete moral compromise. Its really unfortunate because jobs like police officer and military are super low skill and relatively high pay but they require you to make yourself an ally to the fascist state.