this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2025
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[–] caseyweederman@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Also, in the Apocrypha, childhood Jesus turned a kid he didn't like into a tree. Quite possibly... a fig tree.

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 4 points 2 weeks ago

Jesus was a little asshole. It's pretty funny those works survived.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Jesus:i cast curse

DM: roll to hit

Jesus: nevermind i cast true polymorph

DM: at?

Jesus: that pesky SOB over there

DM: the eight year old?

Jesus: well now he's a fig tree.

DM: Jesus, dude...

Jesus: I cast curse on the tree