Cw: fish
On the 2nd of march 1964, a group of indigenous rights activists, among them actor Marlon Brando and Puyallup tribal leader Bob Satiacum, illegally fished in the Puyallup River to protest the denial of treaty rights to Native Americans. This form of civil disobedience is known as a "fish-in", and in this specific incident both Brando and an Episcopal clergyman were arrested.
The fish-in was staged by the National Indian Youth Council, a Native American civil rights organization formed in Gallup, New Mexico in 1961. It became part of the so-called "Fish Wars", a set of protests spanning decades in which Native American tribes around the Puget Sound pressured the U.S. government to recognize fishing rights granted by the Point No Point Treaty.
The protests eventually won indigenous people in the area the right to fish without state permits - in the 1974 case "United States v. Washington", U.S. District Court Judge George Hugo Boldt stated that treaty right fishermen must be allowed to take up to 50% of all potential fishing harvests and required that they have an equal voice in the management of the fishery.
The so-called "Boldt Decision" was reaffirmed by the Supreme Court in 1979 and has been used as a precedent for handling other, similar treaties.
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I got some sleep!
and maybe gonna try eating like broth and soup and yogurt later tonight. and if that doesn't help. I dunno. maybe think about going to see a doctor or something. but I also dont really want to because no health insurance and would rather like hope it clears up or whatever on its own. but like stomach fucking still hates me and I hate it right now and I hate myself.
also gonna vent again. kind of long
cw: I dunno grief stuff about my mom again, some gender dysphoria stuff to, and like depression of course
while I was waking up, my brain remembered an old song that I used to listen that I haven't heard in years? weird how that happens. but like it that beauty is within us song from ghost in the shell. I remember listening to it quite a lot when I was getting a lot of gender dysphoria in the past. I decided to go listen to it, and like yea. still depressing as hell. but like it just hits a little differently now to I guess with like my mom being dead.I dunno why im thinking about her so much lately. I guess probably because it's almost getting close to a year now since she died. and like around this time, things were really rough between my dad drinking himself to death, getting mad at me for like needing him to drive me to my moms, and then my mom and siblings getting mad at me for not doing enough for her because I couldn't be there 24/7 because watching out for my dad while trying not to like, get on his bad side and avoiding his drinking. I think some of my sleep issues stem from like having to wake really early, just before like my dad started drinking. so he could take me. and like bring me back before he started drinking. but also like, making sure my dad would wake up in the morning. but then again, my sleep always been fucked so I dunno!
I know grief like not easy and stuff and like death is never easy? just I dunno. like my stomach hating me right now is like reminding me of my mom before like. she needed to go to the hospital. before she went to the hospital, she like. didn't want to go? and she had me come over to like, cook and clean for her and help her with stuff. except like, that wasn't going to work out this time. since like. she had sepsis. when I saw her, something was def. wrong. and like when she tried to go use the restroom, I still like, remember her like screams of pain? anyways she got like really angry at me for like telling her she needed to go the ER and an ambulance and getting that there. she did like apologize later on once she learned she had sepsis when at the hospital. I dunno why that still bothers me, just mainly like her screams when using the restroom. that like what's really getting to me.
and I guess another thing bothering me is just like. how transphobic she was at times. like not going into that. but it def. like. makes this a more harder to process. maybe its like why I remembered that song? I dunno. ugh all this stuff from this year alone makes me feel like I really like exhausting myself to death. like probably actually? I really need to get my weight up since I am very underweight again
really "nice" how my dad doesn't really seem to notice that like I dunno. I just might be struggling.. just a bit! I dunno! like besides the whole not eating at times, there like the fucked sleep issues. not much concern from him. meanwhile I got a lot of concern for him when he's drinking or like, his cough. but whatever, I remember last year or whenever when he was drunk, how he belittled me saying I'm just like "one of the good mentally ill ones!" like thanks for dehumanizing me! sometimes I think how nice it would just be to not wake up and just like give up, since sometimes I def. feel like I would not be missed. just an annoyance, a burden. a pest no one really wants to deal with. but I also understand that just like I dunno, emotional pain speaking along with some depression. whatever, im just gonna go like play xcom 2 or gw2 or watch a movie or something. I haven't really been doing anything fun. kind of just been sitting around, doing nothing.