He can be a bastard and your brother!
Wait... actually I guess he can only be one...
this post was submitted on 31 Aug 2025
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Illegalism
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A person is not their occupation.
Idk I feel like that doesn't apply to all occupations. A Nazi, e.g., is a Nazi
I've still not forgiven my sister for joining the police like 30 years ago. She quit after about 5 years but it stuck with me how perfect that job was for her personality, and that gave me pause.
If they change their beliefs and actions, they are no longer Nazis. They can’t erase what they’ve done or said, and you don’t need to forgive them, but they can start working against fascism instead of for it.
Sure but that’s beside the point of the post
Yeah, "All Cops" means all cops, including my brother, but I still love him
Did you miss this bit?
All cops. Not all former cops.
I’d rather go with:
OP’s brother is not his occupation. He wasn’t born a cop, so let’s not objectify him as one. Who knows how he ended up with this job and how easy it would be to get him to quit. I have no problem with OP loving his brother, and he can hope/want/urge his brother to change his occupation.
I’d prefer not to go with:
OP is a cop-loving bastard sympathizer.
ACAB to me and most of those I’ve talked to it about, means there’s not such thing as a good cop. All cops uphold a damaging system of authority whether they try to be good or not.
I wouldn’t take it so literally as calling someone whose brother is a cop a bastard sympathiser. Although I understand some people do.
I also wouldn’t use it to insult someone who used to be a cop but got woke.
Anyways. I think me and you generally agree but are arguing about semantics ahah.
I can tell you're coming from a good place with this and wanted to be supportive of me! It's very kind, but unfortunately I think it's misplaced.
My brother almost certainly won't change- pretty sure he voted for trump twice, and he's been climbing the ranks over the past decade. I genuinely don't have any moral/ethical justification for keeping him in my life 😬
yeah but if your occupation is something bad like chiropractor, homeopathist, so-called gay conversion therapy practitioner, con man, tobacco lobbyist, hitman, pimp - you can say they're bad
The things they’re doing are bad. They can quit doing those things.
This just feels like semantics, and it comes across as cop apologia.
"There's no such thing as a bad person, only people who do bad things" is a valid belief, but I don't think this is an appropriate context for that.
The “I still love him” part of your post seems like you practice this philosophy.
He should quit being a cop though.
I do kind of, but like, backwards lol.
E.g., I don't even believe any actions are inherently "wrong" or "immoral", but I only discuss this conceptually, and never in the context of things like genocide.
My brother and I have a mutual understanding that if shit really goes sideways and it comes down to it (civil war, etc), we'll be on the receiving end of one another's lethal violence. I think that our ultimate willingness to do that is what allows us to be close until that breaking point
Bro is scarface