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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/MisterHeyDude on 2025-10-21 00:06:20+00:00.
This happened roughly 5 hours ago while I was at work and I might also be a huge dick for how I went about it, so feel free to rip me apart in the comments as it might be deserved. I'll try not to ramble too much but this may become a bit of a rabbit hole.
Some potentially helpful context ~ I (31M, single, probably autistic) have never really been bothered about dating, haven't used social media for quite some years. Have reddit to browse mostly and while I do have Tinder I really haven't put any effort into it and use it as more of a fidget device when I'm bored, not expecting anything to come of it because I don't present myself well, but still being open if anything should come about. I've been at my current job in a local pet food store for a little over 2 years and have come to know most of my customers pretty well and while I don't know all their names I recognize most faces. This one lady who we'll call Alice (~30F, fake name) started coming around I think early spring of this year, doesn't get her dog food through us but gets toys when she stops by maybe every other month. Conversation is usually short but pleasant, her dog is absolutely adorable and goes nuts for whatever toy Alice puts in front of her. About 3 weeks ago Alice had us order her a toy we don't keep in stock so I took her information, we gave her a call when it was in and...nothing. Around 2 weeks went by and we didn't hear anything from her so we just put it on the wall, stuff happens, it's no big deal.
Last week (about 2.5 weeks after her order was placed) by some coincidence I found Alice while I was bored swiping through Tinder and I had one of those small world moments and chuckled to myself. Swiped right because why not, she's cute, had some cool artwork in one of her photos, and profile seemed interesting but once again I really don't expect anything to come of it, and at this point wasn't even really sure if she was still shopping with us. Typically I don't like to mix business and personal relationships but I figured this time it was harmless because how could it possibly go anywhere.
That brings us to today and the FU. Alice comes in early afternoon and says "Hey, I'm here to pick up that toy I ordered" so I walked over to the wall and grabbed it for her since it hadn't sold yet and we started talking. Now I really set myself up for failure by foolishly mentioning "I accidentally saw some of your art recently it looked really cool" because it was. I didn't want to bring up Tinder because saying to someone directly "I saw you on Tinder" seems rather awkward and probably uncomfortable, and I'm not one to flirt with customers because you never know how it will go and I just don't see it as professional, and possibly losing someone over a comment going over poorly just isn't worth it. So then she asks me "Oh yeah? Where did you see it? Instagram or (I don't remember the second site she mentioned)" and in my head I'm immediately thinking "Oh shit, shouldn't have done that" so I shrink a bit and just kinda mumble "Tinder..." because at this point I really don't know how to get myself out of the situation I've started and immediately tried to pivot describing the drawing and just kinda saying "I thought the design was really cool" and at some point I mentioned something about tattoo inspiration but from that point in the conversation my memory is a bit spotty because I was in a bit of a panic. Shortly after to my surprise she asks me "Oh do you want to add me on Instagram?" To which I rather flatly stated "I don't use it" she responds "Oh..." and seemed maybe a bit down? But I didn't really think anything of it, and being so out of the loop with social media I just figured that people commonly exchange their alias' and that it's no big deal. The interaction lasted a few more minutes as she paid, took the tags off the toy to give to her dog and I still attempted to make small talk but it definitely felt off compared to a few minutes prior. She left and I went about my day. My manager who I was working with all day today (also a buddy of mine who got me the job) heard most of the conversation but never really chimed in at any point. About 2 hours later I had an "OH FUCK WAIT A MINUTE" moment, mentioned to him "You know I just realized when I told her I don't use Instagram she seemed to get a little down" to which he tells me "Yeah bud you fucked up, that was her basically extending you an olive branch and you pretty much told her to go fuck herself" Honestly I had a really good laugh for a moment, as it's certainly not the first time something like this has happened. I must have at least 4 other stories where I didn't realize until months, years or in one case more than a decade later, but at the same time I couldn't help but feel like a huge asshole because I can't imagine what it must feel like to be in a situation where "Hey this person seems to be showing interest in me, but then also shot me down". I certainly don't expect to see her again after today and if I do I'll probably just keep my stupid mouth shut because I just feel terribly about how that went down.
So let me know, was this a FU? If so how badly did I FU? I'll take any roasting people want to dish out.
TL;DR Found a new(ish) customer of mine on Tinder. Wanted to compliment her art thinking nothing of it, she offered to add me on Instagram which I told her I don't use. She left seemingly upset and I got told I'm a dumbass by my manager for fumbling the whole thing.