this post was submitted on 24 Jan 2024
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Memes

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[–] thorbot@lemmy.world 56 points 1 year ago

Hey are you a cigarette? cuz baby you’re subsidized as fuck and heavily marketed to children and you make me hack up a fuckin lung every time I smell you

[–] troglodytis@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Maven@lemmy.world 31 points 1 year ago (4 children)
[–] Master@lemm.ee 64 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Because being around you gave me cancer.

[–] SayJess@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Bah gawd! That man has a family!

[–] Darkenfolk@dormi.zone 12 points 1 year ago
[–] gsfraley@lemmy.world 42 points 1 year ago

Haha thanks you too

[–] troglodytis@lemmy.world 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Na, cause I wanna get lit and put you in my butt

[–] troglodytis@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Wait, no

Cause my butt is lit and I'm drooling on you

[–] troglodytis@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Wait Wait... No

Cause I'm objectifying you so much it's life threatening, but it's ok cause society normalized me

[–] blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You are what you... What you eat?

[–] TheDarksteel94@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 year ago

I've seen someone do that. A whole pack.

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Rampsquatch@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Lmaydev@programming.dev 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Exactly. Your butt should be clean. It's really easy to clean your butt before hand. When I see these sort of comments I assume people are just gross and can't imagine people having clean butts.

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Well, allow a career nurse's assistant to chime in.

Having wiped and washed asses for not a living (seriously, the pay is bad) for twenty years, I can 100% guarantee you that it does not matter how much you wash the ass, if there are worms in the intestines, you still run the risk of sucking a few of them up while you're hoovering the ass with your tongue.

And, even if you hose that thing down, the risk of bacterial transfer is non zero.

First, the ol' brown eye is wrinkly as hell. Washing your own ass means you can't see everything to be certain you got every last trace of fecal matter. That trace may be smaller than a pinhead, but when you're tongue-punching the fart box, that pinhead is still going to get licked up.

Second, it isn't like all the bacteria in the area magically disappear. Most people get so focused on the anus itself, they don't remember to scrub the cheeks. Maybe you're an exception to that, I dunno. But bacteria are fast spreading little bastards. Anything that's even remotely close will be back in under an hour.

And, even with hot, running water and soap, you can't guarantee 100% removal of all bacteria. Even with antimicrobial soaps and supplies, you're washing your ass blind, and it's wrinkly. So chances are that there are still small batches hiding in a wrinkle. A few minutes after drying off, and they're enjoying the hot, moist goodness of a gluteal crease, having a bacteria party and reproducing like, well, bacteria.

All of that ignores that as soon as you fart the first time, some amount of bacteria are coming out. Even without that, the anal sphincters (yes, there's multiple) aren't exactly airtight. Something microscopic is more than small enough to creep out.

So, scrub away as much as you like, but anyone eating your ass is still coming in contact with some amount of intestinal content, including but not limited to, feces, e-coli, and any worm eggs or worms present.

[–] Maven@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

When I posted this meme I wasn't expecting a lesson on anal hygiene but I appreciate it. Thank you for taking the time to write this. I appreciate you.

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 1 points 1 year ago

Now talk about the bacteria in a vagina and how we shouldn't do any oral sex. Or how much bacteria is in a mouth.

[–] platypus_plumba@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

People are disgusting as fuck.

"Look, where shit comes out from, it looks delicious"

[–] 1984@lemmy.today -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I will never understand it either.

[–] zalgotext@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's an erogenous zone. There's tons and tons of nerves down there. You'll really never understand why that area is a pleasure center for some?

[–] 1984@lemmy.today 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah but I will never touch it on another human because it's disgusting.

[–] zalgotext@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago

You think it's disgusting, which is fine. A bunch of other people don't think it's disgusting, which is also fine, as long as everyone consents, is safe about it, and understands the risks. Like, you know, every single risky activity that people do for fun/pleasure.

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 15 points 1 year ago

And they say romance is dead...

[–] callyral@pawb.social 13 points 1 year ago

Hey, are you a cigarette? Because you smell bad. Go take a shower.

[–] RealPuyo@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Lung cancer rizz