What Schedule III Doesn't Do:
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It doesn't legalize cannabis federally
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It doesn't allow you to legally possess or consume cannabis under federal law
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It doesn't stop federal law enforcement from prosecuting you
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It doesn't resolve banking issues for most cannabis businesses
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It doesn't expunge the records of the millions arrested for cannabis offenses
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It doesn't allow interstate commerce
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It doesn't remove cannabis from the Controlled Substances Act
What Schedule III Does Do:
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Removes IRS Code 280E, giving massive tax breaks to large cannabis corporations
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Requires FDA approval for cannabis products (hello, Big Pharma!)
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Subjects dispensaries and growers to the Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act
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Creates new federal crimes including selling prescription drugs without a license, misbranding, and illegal distribution
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Effectively hands the cannabis market to pharmaceutical companies while crushing small operators
Chief Pantysniffer Ted Cruz is monitoring the submissions personally. He’s on call 24/7, especially in the wee hours of the night when his wife and kids are asleep and he needs to drive out to some truck stop and investigate baddie behavior himself.