hazl

Relaxed? They pace back and forth like they're awaiting a jury verdict.

The name, or rather the brand, is the point. It's like getting an H&M or a Uniqlo. Turning Point is a trusted, international name in the bigotry business.

You're more than welcome, and I'm glad you posted here.💙

I agree that the right friends give you a big push to do the right things. Personally I have a tendency to base my entire self worth on my ability to please others, eroding my sense of self in the process. But that's my thing that I shouldn't project onto you. I just hope that you'll be careful that what you're doing is satisfying your social needs, rather than using other people as a substitute for self actualisation. Dating, however, can be a huge risk if you're feeling emphatically lonely, as you're more sensitive to rejection, real or perceived, and it can push you down deeper. Be careful out there.

Congrats on the training and interviewing! I really hope that place works out for you. If there's any part of you feeling shame for being a "dropout" or having a sparse CV, let that go. All that matters now is that you're active, you're learning, and you're trying. Good employers care that you're doing stuff now. No one else is thinking about your failures and false starts.

It sounds like you were holding out hope that the pieces of your life would fall into place in the course of transition. It must be crushing to still feel so lost. The obvious first thing is to resume therapy. You're thinking about doing it, the rest of your post screams that you should do it, other people are commenting that you should do it. Don't delay it. Especially if finding a therapist is a pain the ass, which I assume means looking for one now won't pay off for a long time.

Regarding the failed friendships, I can only say that the lifecycle of adult friendships is often short and it isn't necessarily a reflection on you. Also, a staggering number of people just don't put in the work to keep friendships alive. Don't beat yourself up over it. Keep reaching out, but if people aren't reaching back... Meh.

I don't want to sound preachy about alcohol. You're already on top of that. I just want to say that as a previously pretty light drinker, I still feel the benefit of stopping entirely. I do sometimes miss the ritual of a glass of red while cooking dinner, but not enough to go back to it.

You said that you like running, and that's one activity you haven't mentioned doing in a group. Would you consider joining a running or hiking group? It seems like a low pressure way to incorporate other people into your lifestyle.

I also struggle to conceive of a fulfilling life without a romantic partner, but I try to steer myself towards appreciating the platonic relationships I've made and will continue to make. I also know that my loneliness is worse than it should be. I resent my own company, and seek the company of others to avoid myself. Solitude in moderate doses should not be torture. Again, therapy. I don't think it's wise to focus on your hypothetical partner, as it can blind you to how rich and varied life can be outside of that pursuit. Be open to it, but don't fixate on it.

You didn't elaborate on why you can't keep a job for long, but you're clearly an intelligent and tenacious person, and I get the feeling that you're just taking jobs to get by rather than looking for one that makes you tick. I wonder if that's tied to your low self esteem, because you don't believe you deserve a more fulfilling job. Something that takes up as much of your life as a job does should feel somewhat rewarding aside from the money you're making. Also, as someone who's lacking sufficient human connection, you shouldn't be settling for a lonely job. By that I mean either a job performed in solitude, or a workplace with a shitty culture.

A lot of what you're saying resonates with me, except I'm very early in my transition, so it's kind of like you're reminding me how important it is to keep working on myself. I'm not magically going to become the woman I want to be because of hormones and surgeries. Loving oneself and feeling valid in this world is still its own endeavour. As important as it is to find kinship with others, it should never be at the expense of being who you are.

Thank you for creating merciful content!

Let's go deeper.

I feel so much more comfortable and authentic being heavily feminine. If I were to drop absolutely every shred of learned masculinity, it would be jarring to people who know me. I'm balancing shedding my made–up masculine past with staying at least somewhat recognisable as the person they first met. I don't know how necessary this is, but that's the mental gymnastics I'm dealing with right now.

• Break the masculine habits of the past
• Be feminine enough for the people who might think you're not "making an effort"
• Don't be so feminine that people will think you're playing a character

“For this movie to make any sense at all, one has to believe the United States, today, right now, is a fascist dictatorship,” wrote David Marcus at Fox News

Putting aside the obvious retort one would give to this sort of comment, works of fiction do tend to require acceptance of a fictional reality!

What? No! My 420K, is what I'm sure I meant.

What's with the vertical line on the right? Is that to illustrate where the third dimension would appear?

Congratulations! I feel like the potential for euphoria has been somewhat hampered by tensions with your family lately, so it's really nice to hear about the good things that are happening for you. 💙

Name and gender change is the gift that keeps on giving. The day my birth certificate arrived, the first time I saw my name on my banking app, my superannuation account, my health insurance, my cervical cancer screening reminder (not necessary but thanks for thinking of me, Department of Health), and so many other little things. For the first couple of weeks I was doing involuntary squealing happy dances every time I got a new card or a letter from a government agency. The term "euphoria" had never felt more appropriate.

All squares are rectangles, but it is true that none of these rectangles are squares.

This is appalling. Protest anyway, Sydney. They just gave you another reason to do so.