Casual Conversation

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Time to look for a new job ig.

My boss just grinned and laughed awkwardly as I explained why I want a raise and why I deserve it. The company wants me to get certifications on my own time and I want more money to make up sacrificing my free time. If I don't get the raise (pretty sure they aren't going to give it to me) I'm not getting the certs they want and will do the bare fucking minimum.

Then in a meeting with all the bosses and HR, I asked if they could ask the other employees to message me if they're coming in sick so I can mask up. I'm the first person here every day and I have an autoimmune disease and have gotten very sick from my coworkers multiple times this year. My superiors told me that they can ask but told me that I NEED to take precautions outside of work. They told me it's only fair that I take precautions all the time outside of work since apparently people texting me before they come in is too much to ask for. They brought up places outside of work that they know I go to and were so shitty about me not masking up there. I was also asked if I considered a permanent wfh position but was then told that permanent wfh would prevent me from advancing to higher positions. I have already had a promotion dangled in front of my face for a year only to be told that the standards I need to meet before that are higher than the standards people already in that position are already held to.

I was also given shit for calling off for being sick or having migraines. God forbid I take care of myself.

I'm getting surgery in July and their only concern when I told them was how much time I'll need to take off. I was prepared to only take one day off and suffer through working from home. Now they're pushing me to go on short term disability for my recovery. I can't financially afford that.

I never really understood, but now that that house bill passed that may end up blocking AI regulation from individual States. I get it. I don't like knowing that even if everyone in my state wanted to stop companies from using AI for hiring decisions, we couldn't.

Texans, I feel you.

Edit: I'm learning a lot about Texas in this thread. Thanks for all the context folks.

I'm nervous as hell.

Do you believe our society is currently programmed to victim blame or we are already doing the best we can to handle malicious people?

I've listened to a lot of different music over the years. I listen to music so much all day mostly as background noise... I recently moved to a new place, and the neighbor sometimes plays Jazz in the weekends. I seriously open the windows and turn off my own music. Something about it is just soo nice and chill. Something with the vibe, I don't know. The closest genre I listen to similar to Jazz, is Downtempo. Here for reference: Youtube Music | Spotify

The wooden kind

I noticed a lot of people seem to browse by All yet complain there's not much content, whereas I'm browsing by Subscribed and I still feel like there's an unreal amount of content, far more than I could consume even if I was browsing Lemmy Non-Stop all day.

I wonder if maybe sharing our subscribed communities with each other would help?

About a year ago, I got married. I couldn’t invite everyone from my friend group, so I decided to only invite people I actually spend time with one-on-one outside of group stuff over the past year or two.

There are two people in the group—one of them being the one this is really about—who I honestly wouldn’t even know if they stopped hanging out with our shared friends. We’ve never done anything just the two of us. We only ever see each other at parties every few months.

Thing is, those two are also the ones who organize everything. They’ve kind of created their own mini friend group inside the bigger group—like 6 or 7 people out of 15 who get invited to the real stuff: birthdays, city trips, holidays, etc. And five of those people are actually close friends of mine.

When I invited 9 of the 15 to my wedding, I told people I just couldn’t include everyone. Most people were cool with it, even her best friend didn’t mind. But now, she’s throwing a party for her 30th birthday and invited everyone—except me.

She’s never invited me to her birthday before, which is part of why I didn’t invite her to the wedding in the first place. I figured if we’re not close enough for a birthday dinner, a wedding isn’t happening either.

But this time it’s different. She invited literally everyone else in the group. My best friend wasn’t invited either, but that makes sense—he doesn’t really know her. With me, though, I’m pretty sure it’s payback for not inviting her to my wedding.

And yeah... I don’t know. I usually don’t care about her events because I’m not close with her. But this time feels different. Not because I wanted to go to her party—but because everyone else is going. I know I’ll be left out when they’re all talking about it later. I’ll miss out on those shared moments, even if it’s with people I do care about.

I get it. I didn’t invite her, she’s not inviting me. Fair enough. But I can’t help feeling weird about it. Like, yeah, maybe I started this when I didn’t include her—but at the same time, she’s the one who’s always made the group feel split in two. She’s been excluding people for years.

Anyway, here we are. Not invited. And for once, it actually kind of stings. Wish it didn’t. But this one hits different.

I probably won't be able to fix this cause even on group gatherings we rarely have a 1:1 conversation. Like never had... she is the person that is always there and in the middle of all but if we talk it's in a group setting. I can't remember if I ever talked alone with her.

I personally would have invited her to something like a birthday. But I don't celebrate my birthdays. I never did and I don't care about my birthday. Three years ago I planned a trip to a theme park and I invited everyone (and her) to join and organised everything. A few weeks later she organised something else but only with the 5 other friends. So that was the last time I organised something.

It's weird because this person also makes me feel very insecure. It's not that I don't like her but when she is around I am totally different. I am more quiet, scared to say things I would normally say,... it's a very loud person and I just don't like that. But that is all I have to her. Maybe she is different alone but I sometimes do wonder why everyone likes her. She likes to be in the middle of everything, kind of like attention seeker. But not really either... To me she comes off as passive toxic. If I just observe her at parties I am always happy I only see her at these parties and not on vacations, trips etc... but maybe it's also cause I am mad about the splitting of our group and that she didn't invite me 3 years ago after I organised a trip first.

This feeling actually made me more silent, I avoid going to these parties more and more. I go more to the gym, do things with 2 other friends but I feel like I am isolating myself more and more and trying to find new people which is very hard. I go to the gym like 6 times a week and talk with someone there but that is it. This whole thing makes me feel like I am not really wanted anymore in that group and maybe she is saying things to my other friends about me. Or I am just thinking this going full psycho and nothing is going on. In the end maybe she just forgot to invite me and doesn't even care - but that I don't believe. This time she excluded me on purpose and invited the others who she normally never invites intentionally.

Why is life so much suffering?

I never take long ones so I'm intrigued

How to get the best Mondays?

Go to a supermarket or any grocery store. Grab any Felix, Purina, Friskies. (no Whiskas). Run back home. Give this food to your Divine companion (aka cat). Then, we can relax.

Have you ever forgotten to feed your cat?

Kind reminder: By law (Divine Kitties law, Art 1): lack of food the morning, it is blasphemy. You may bare any consequences of moodiness.