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The choice isn't between being single or settling. It's between keeping your options open for the right person or going back to your abuser.
Calling a partner who cheats an abuser is quite the leap.
There are remorseless serial cheaters for sure, and that is abusive and cruel behavior. There are also people who cheat because they feel like their needs aren't being meet and haven't figured out how to communicate that. And when that happens, there's three options: figure your shit out, learn how to communicate, and rebuild trust; figure your shit out, learn to communicate, and accept if your partner isn't interested in staying with you; or don't take accountability. I don't think any of those make them "abusers," even the last one which is quite shitty. It makes them a flawed human and someone who shouldn't try to be with someone until they figure out how to be better.
Edit to add, I was pondering more and there is a 4th option. I was thinking "don't take accountability and get dumped." But there is also "don't take accountability and your partner stays with you," and I would agree that that is abusive.
You're welcome to define it however you like, but it is by definition an abuse of trust, the relationship, and the other person. You can read through OPs comments on other posts to come to your conclusion on whether or not you think they're abusive, but in a more general sense, that's what it is.