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Don't log splitters work incredibly slow?
That's not really gonna chop people's heads off, rather it would inexorably pinch their necks until their head falls off.
That's pretty fucking gruesome.
Most wood splinters do move slow but that one (Large valve and accumulator) would make it faster.
If we're going for gruesome, how about we build a huge version of one of those slicers that they feed vegetables in, and just feed the oligarchs into it.
Gives you the option to feed them head first if you want to show mercy, while still being able to feed them in feet first for someone like Musk.
Then they are cut up into small, easy to compost pieces.
Wood chippers exist and are pretty much this
While I appreciate the composting efficiency, I was thinking something like this for maximum gruesomeness:
https://youtube.com/shorts/c7lSg0T0dJ0
that's just a wood chipper on less of an angle and with the blade shown
and a bigger blade because it doesn't have the stiffening framework behind