this post was submitted on 03 Oct 2025
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Would You Rather
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Welcome to c/WouldYouRather, where we present you with the toughest, most ridiculous choices you never knew you had to make! Would you rather have a third arm that's only useful for picking your nose, or be able to talk to animals but only if they're wearing hats? Yeah, it's that kind of vibe. Come for the absurdity, stay because you've clearly got nothing better to do with your life.
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Hmm, bear. With a month of preparation and a sturdy spear I think I can do it.
I've fought enough chickens to fucking fear three geese at once. I think people are underestimating that. And also, money.
I had retired fighting chickens that I kept.
One filled the heart out of the other in a fight...
They are unbelievably violent.
(Later ate them although their heirs survive to this day) also ate some of their heirs ๐ญ
Yep. Did they ever manage to break your skin? A wing to the face is also way more uncomfy than I think Reddit/Lemmy ever anticipates, and geese are much bigger and built to actually fly. I don't know if they could actually kill me, but they could shred me to a bloody pulp and there's not much I can do to stop it.
I guess I am assuming they're seriously trying to kill me back. If they act like normal geese I might change my answer, since just splitting them up should be doable.
They did. Hand and arm only, but those fucks were not kind.
I still think you are underestimating the strength and violence of an average Joe. And the usefulness of thumbs
Well, it's about me specifically, not someone else. I know if I stomp on a goose hard it's going to do damage, but then again I can only attempt it so many times before exhaustion, and there's the whole issue of what the other two are doing during that movement. If I grab a part and bend it a way it doesn't go, that's more reliable and repeatable, but I'd have to have the chance.
My actual plan would be to not stop moving, bat away the attacks I can, protect my eyes, and take any opportunities as they come.
With the bear, I spend the month training with the spear, and wait for the bear to come to me. If it impales itself it's a matter of strength, weight and technique to keep myself on the not-deadly side. The thing I fear most would be it managing to swipe the spear out of the way and then close on me, in which case I die painfully. If it goes well, I come out unscratched and set for life.