Ask Lemmy
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
view the rest of the comments
So I dipped my toe in the PUA pipeline, back when it was called PUA. The ethos actually makes a couple decent points.
One is that it's a numbers game. A quality relationship is based on compatibility. Compatibility is based on lots of things, but the more people you meet the more likely you are to find someone of higher compatibility.
So mostly you just gotta get out there and meet people. You can do that via apps, you can do that via hobbies, but you just gotta get out there and interact with people.
Another part of that is accepting that not every interaction is going to end in true love. Ironically, putting less importance on any individual encounter makes you respond more attractively in general.
Accept that whatever encounter you're in won't end in a romantic partner, and that's fine, you can just hang out and have fun. You'll be more likely to stumble upon people who dig your vibe and want to know you better.
Obsess over particular individuals, and you're certain to drive them away, and also scare off any real prospects.
Chill out and have no expectations.