this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2025
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Sorry if this is weird, I'm trying to navigate parent-child relationships and I'm just curious what this is like from the parents' perspective.

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[–] Nomad 12 points 1 day ago

I'm a dad of 3 and I love then unconditionally until the end of times. Protecting them from harm and preparing them for life (which is protection for their future) is my number one priority. Showing them affection and getting it from them is very important to me and them, but as they age it gets harder for them to show they like and need affection. So I let the older ones come to me and offer affection and advice always, even when she is exploding and emotional at times. I never force it and it usually doesn't happen, but offering helps her see that I love her even in these difficult situations.

I assume you are from an Asian background. So the expectations can be pretty heavy I hear. Remember that this probably comes from what they experienced and what they want for you. There is sometimes the expectation of children taking care of their parents when they age. And that is usually a cultural thing.

As a parent I often wish my oldest would just talk to me and we figure out together what she needs in this situation. My age and experience should count for something but I need to be open to understand her situation and allow her to make her own decisions up to a point. Instead there is a lot of shouting and throwing doors closed and I usually wait until she calms down and then go try talk to her.