I hope this is okay to post here. My (F) relationship with my wife (F) is wonderful except for household issues. The thing I want to talk/vent about here is me trying to cook meals for the past two years while navigating our incompatible palates.
I gave up being a vegetarian when I moved in with her, because she doesn't like most vegetables or any mock meats, so chicken unlocked a rare protein that we agree on beyond just eating bean burritos every day. She doesn't eat as much beef as she used to, so I wasn't the only person who gave things up.
She would probably be happy eating scrambled eggs without any sides or fast food for dinner every day, and I need something more nutritionally balanced to feel nourished. So I'm the one who cooks every day.
We've tried compromising every which way, coming up with new meal plans, researching recipes for hours, and I feel like I've made hundreds of meals she's disliked. It feels like she only likes my cooking when it's unhealthy and lacks vegetables, which is great sometimes, but not every day. It's really gotten to me, and I've lost my love of cooking and my self-confidence in the kitchen. Most of all, I'm extremely stressed out about dinner every night.
We're at the point where we're talking about making our own meals, other than a few of my less-than-healthy comfort food recipes she likes. It's probably the most harmonious way to live, but the idea has me feeling really sad because cooking for others is a love language, and I learned to do this in the first place because I always dreamed of cooking for whoever I ended up marrying.
TL;DR My wife and I can't agree on meals we both like. I do all the cooking in the relationship, but now we're talking about making separate dinners. This is painful because cooking for others is a love language and I feel like I've failed.
Update: I really appreciate all the kind words and advice. I definitely don't plan to make it a habit to use this community as a space to vent, but you're all wonderful and I appreciate you. 😃
Definitely relatable. There's definitely possibilities after realizing it's important to meet our SOs where they're at on food. I haven't lived with my partner for very long in the scheme of things, so there's time to grow. I like the idea of introducing new meals as side dishes and putting work into specific components (like bread) where you can.