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Its funny, because I've felt similarly in the past. But then I got some really great advice.
You aren't special. Your problems aren't that unique. There are already ready-made solutions for almost every problem you have, and your real problem is that you tell yourself that you are especially worse off and your problems are totally unique, because otherwise you would have to admit that the reason you keep failing is that you were just too dumb and lazy to do the obvious hard work everyone else was doing. So shut the fuck up and stick to the program as written. After you've finished the program, then you're allowed to criticize it.
May or may not be applicable to you. But it was what I needed to hear
I needed to hear that. Thank you