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camelbeard@lemmy.world

dealing with so much anger towards my family (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 months ago by WhyDoYouThinkThat@lemmy.world to c/dadvice@lemmy.world

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My aunt and her husband live with me and my son. I pay the mortgage by myself

my son just drinks. no job, no education, no progress of any kind towards his goals. he's dealing with a lot of pain right now because of some abuse that happened. it's a mountain, he's powerless. i'm afraid he's going to drink himself to death. i'm angry because i'm constantly afraid/in pain because of him and he refuses to do anything about it

my aunt is autistic but doesn't realize it. she's always struggled with interpersonal relationships. she was abused by her dad at a young age and it turned her into a monster. nothing is ever her fault. if she hurts you, it's your fault for being there. it's your fault for being in the way. it's your fault for having thin skin.

my aunt's husband is 300 pounds and won't stop eating. he does a lot of work around the house - construction, carpentry, landscaping but he's not going to live long.

i'm just hurt and angry all the time. i'm alone and i'm stuck here. i don't know what to do.

do any of you guys struggle with this?

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[–] WhyDoYouThinkThat@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Yes I'm ok with critical feedback

my aunt is poison for him; he's almost completely non contact with her. he's been planning to move back to the city where he got his degree and begin practicing. I thought that by now he'd be out of her life completely. I can't bear to kick someone out of this house. I think I'm waiting for him to leave
no intervention but I did tell him honestly that I don't want to walk in on his corpse. he joked and said "no promises". I don't think he knows how scared I am. I'll tell him we need to have a serious talk and verify he's willing to listen. It's possible he doesn't know how much this sucks for the rest of us.
he has a trust fund he withdraws from, and, honestly, I don't know. I think he's living with me because it's free and he can spend all his money on booze.

he uses my car. god. I know this sounds so pathetic. but I can't take that away from him, even though he's using it to get loaded. i've been trapped by loved ones before and I can't force that on him.

yeah. I need to be back in therapy. it's more than I can afford. my insurance only covers 3 sessions a year. I rarely have bad days like the one above; usually I'm an optimistic guy. My family has been through a lot and I know we'll get through this too (etc) right now I'm just tired

Anyway thanks for the response and I appreciate the advice