ADHD

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A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

Rules:

No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
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Mark NSFW content accordingly.
No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).

Encouraged:

Funny memes.
Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
Questions on confusing situations.
Seeking and sharing support.
Engagement in our values.

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 3 years ago

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MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.world

MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.dbzer0.com

124

Cumulative effects of ADHD burnout in middle age. (lemmy.dbzer0.com)

submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/adhd@lemmy.world

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I've always made up a person to fit in. Masking has taken a toll and I hate the person I've pretended to be. That person is boring, polished, and an over achiever. Since.I was punished severely on a daily basis at 4 years old and afterwards, my true self never was known to me. Only my self who could survive.

Where do we find our unmasked real self after reaching "the big one" burnout? When your braim stops working, you're no longer functional, and the person you made can no longer be sustained, what do you do?

I'm in my 40s and it's rough.

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[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 1 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

You could possibly alter it with effort, but not as easily as a mask.

That's my point. A mask and a face are the same in nature. We all act differently around different people, everyone has different sides to themselves that are all real

Every mask and face you have is a part of you. It's not fake, it's a layer of communication. If you don't feel comfortable in it, it feels like a mask. That's entirely what makes it a mask

You have to examine it and figure out where it doesn't fit right, and then wear it until the changes become ingrained behavior

The final step is to accept you're not wearing a mask anymore

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 2 points 13 hours ago

We all act differently around different people

You've just internalized the problem and called it normal. You shouldn't need to be different around different people. That's exhausting and most people don't do that. That's the neurodivergent coping mechanism.