this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2025
178 points (94.9% liked)

Not The Onion

18382 readers
1751 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
all 39 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 69 points 2 months ago

It's actually incredible how far we've strayed from God's light. We deserve this.

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 37 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] sad_detective_man@leminal.space 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

how did they beat v8 or snapple to this idea? I thought they were making drinkable vegetable sludge a long time ago

[–] Mesophar@pawb.social 5 points 2 months ago (3 children)

v8 had v8 Splash and v8 Fusion since at least the late 90s, though I think they might be discontinued now? But it was tomato/carrot juice with berries and fruits mixed in.

[–] Mjpasta710@midwest.social 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

V8 fusion still exists in the states.

[–] MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Hmm, good to know, I definitely liked that stuff in the early '00s.

[–] sad_detective_man@leminal.space 3 points 2 months ago

hmm, yeah guess they can't ever try frozen smoothies if they discontinue first.

[–] dickalan@lemmy.world -2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sharing what you think versus what you know is a huge problem of information literacy on the Internet and you are a part of it

[–] winkerjadams@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 months ago

You know you could have went and fact checked it yourself and then hey, you know a cool new fact yourself and you could even post a comment here corroborating him or correcting him if he is wrong. Instead you decided to be a dick though. Oh, that's literally your name..

[–] Hiphophorrah@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Add vodka and it becomes a Sunday morning special.

[–] MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Ha, I was literally about to comment about Bloody Marys.

[–] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Asia's been doing ketchup flavored sweets for a while, it might surprise you. It's literally a sugary tomato vinegar paste as is, you realize.

[–] Kernal64@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Just because some people in some part of the world are doing horrifying shit doesn't mean we all need to do horrifying shit.

[–] ruekk@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Don't yuck other peoples yum

[–] dickalan@lemmy.world -4 points 2 months ago

Touch grass weirdo

[–] onslaught545@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I've made plenty of smoothies with v8 as a base, and it's really not that bad if you do it right.

[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

V8 doesn't have nearly as much sugar as ketchup does.

To be exact, V8 has 1g/oz. Ketchup has 8g/oz.

It's not the tomato flavour I'm worried about with this smoothie.

[–] Jackusflackus@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago
[–] MisterNeon@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Someone alert Justin McElroy. This is prime Munch Squad material.

[–] Brunbrun6766@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Was listening to this week's munch squad while reading this...

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Meteor strike now😔

[–] TomMasz@piefed.social 5 points 2 months ago

I know better than to ask why, but why? Was there a public outcry for ketchup smoothies Heinz decided to respond to?

[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 5 points 2 months ago

Ketchup is already a fruit smoothie.

[–] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 months ago

That tracks. Heinz ketchup on it's own has a lot of sugar in it already.

[–] RobotZap10000@feddit.nl 2 points 2 months ago

This is what happens when a time traveler steps on a twig.

[–] 6nk06@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

cultural debate

Shit tomato full of sugar is now cultural. Clown world is great.

[–] abbiistabbii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I would say "Britain No" but Heinz is an American company.

And apparently they are also selling it here, at Smoothie Kings in Atlanta, Chicago, and New York.

I'm kinda glad it's not where I live, because it's exactly the kind of trainwreck I would want to try against my better judgment.