That's why his arms are always extended in paintings where he's talking.
this post was submitted on 27 Sep 2025
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Jesus was the original Godfather. Which is ironic because he's known as the God-Son...
He is the Godfather, the Godson and the holy spirit.
That's why he probably said "Me-boy, look what they've done to me-boy"
he's both, plus a ghost for free! He truly is the King of Kings of Bargins
No, he was a Judean-Roman, Italian-Romans were born on the boot shaped dirt part.
And that's why he turned water into wine and preached tax evasion.
Tax evasion?
I'm ashamed to admit that the joke didn't land because I mixed one thing Jesus did (turning water into wine) with one that he was accused of doing (not paying taxes, which happened when he was brought to Pilatus, IIRC?).
I'm usually funnier when I get my regular hours of sleep, but alas.
That's one part of the bible I have to assume got messed with around the time it became state religion, anyway.
The new new testament:
Luke 6:31 - "And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them, capisci 🤌?
Ah, so that's why he's so often depicted as an Italian guy!
context : https://www.thevintagenews.com/2019/01/12/modern-image-of-jesus/
This very strange idea that one of the modern images of Jesus is based on Cesare originally comes from a claim made by the renowned novelist Alexandre Dumas and picked up and expanded upon by biblical theorists. The argument goes that Jesus was originally depicted as appearing non-European because he was Jewish, which did not sit well with the Borgia pope at the time. So in order to create a more “European-looking” Jesus Pope Alexander VI commissioned new paintings of Jesus using his illegitimate son Cesare as their model.
He then allegedly “ordered the destruction of all art depicting a Semitic Jesus,” thereby popularizing one of the main enduring images of Jesus we have today. So the theory goes.
There's evidence against this though
Another problem is that it ignores the evidence. Jesus began to appear as a figure with a beard and long hair in the 5th century, and his skin tones varied across this period, largely to reflect whichever culture had created the image.
But if you want to compare a painting of Cesare Borgia to a painting of Jesus Christ, look at the icon of Christ Pantocrator at St Catherine’s Monastery in Sinai.
Like Cesare, Christ Pantocrator has long brown hair, a brown beard, and a noble face with defined features, a strong jawline and cheekbones. It looks every inch like the “generic” depiction of Jesus doesn’t it?
Christ Pantocrator was painted on a wooden board in the 6th century, 800 years before Cesare was born.
Ye olde meme
I was thinking more "Many images of Jesus were painted during the predominantly Italian Renaissance, which is where we get our 'common' conception of Jesus in the West; other Christian cultures tend to depict Jesus as ethnicities closer to them than some Euros"
Well shit. Good on you for not spreading old rumours, but I like that one and thought it was real too. To re-emphasise
his skin tones varied across this period, largely to reflect whichever culture had created the image.
Is something I find fun, because "God looks like me, he has to" is a fun thing that idol creating religious people tend to display. He's been black, white and asian.
I dig Ethiopian Jesus, ngl