this post was submitted on 01 Oct 2025
506 points (99.0% liked)

Not The Onion

18262 readers
1846 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Republican Senator Ted Cruz thinks we need to “stop attacking pedophiles.”

The Texas senator made the brutal (potentially) Freudian slip during a Senate hearing about crime on Tuesday.

“Senator Booker also said we should have bipartisan agreement. I think that’s a great idea, we should have bipartisan agreement,” Cruz said. “How ’bout we all come together and say, ‘Let’s stop murders?’ How ’bout we all come together and say, ‘Let’s stop rapes?’ How ’bout we all come together and say, ‘Let’s stop attacking pedophiles?’” [...]


(other outlets portray it as more clearly a mistake, but we're rewarding the outlet leaning into the clickbait because it's more onion-y 🫠)

top 24 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] NONE_dc@lemmy.world 129 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Where I come from there is a saying: "Quien hambre tiene, en pan piensa" (Those who are hungry think of bread.)

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 43 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Love it. I think that's exactly what "Freudian slip" means.

[–] MajorasTerribleFate@lemmy.zip 20 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Oh, I thought it was a kind of lingerie my mom used to wear.

I HAVE to say this is a joke.

[–] tomenzgg@midwest.social 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I HAVE to say this is a joke.

Why? I doubt your mom uses Lemmy.

Honestly, because I take most things as both serious and facetious until I can properly de ide which it was intended as, and I tend to imagine at least a subset people also do that and might decide I wasn't joking. And I had a little hesitation about being unclear.

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 7 points 2 days ago

Here it's "Mis meelel, see keelel" or "mis keelel, see meelel", depending on who you ask. Which translates to either "on the mind, on the tongue" or "on the tongue, on the mind".

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 69 points 3 days ago (1 children)

You guys don't think...?

No, no, surely not.

[–] ThePowerOfGeek@lemmy.world 40 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Well there was that incident on the campaign trail about 10 years ago when his daughter recoiled in disgust when he went to kiss her.

His poor kids. I can't imagine how gross it must be to have him for a father.

[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 19 points 2 days ago

I mean, that sounds like a normal reaction a teenager would have to their father in public.

[–] Skyrmir@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago

This is the plausiblley deniable way for them to put it out in the media. They can check what right wing media reports it and how, then just call it a mistake. Meanwhile they normalize defending pedophiles.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 22 points 2 days ago

What. The. Fuck?

Somebody check his computer

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago

I think its more interesting that none of the other people in the room called him on that

[–] MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 23 points 3 days ago

POS bozo!

Release the Trump/Epstein files

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 6 points 2 days ago

Lizard zodiac killer cruz said this.

[–] Angelusz@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

Freudian slips be real yo.

[–] leaky_shower_thought@feddit.nl 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

must be their phase 1 of the desensitization plan~

ted is surely leading the way.

[–] paraphrand@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So the grooming is projection too…

i can totally see that angle loool

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago
[–] switcheroo@lemmy.world -4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Not all republikkkans are pedophiles but all pedophiles are republikkkan. And they are all okay with pedophilia even if they aren't the ones doing the child abuse.

[–] Electric_Druid@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I guarantee you not all pedophiles are Republican. I hate both groups, but let's be real here

[–] Soulg@ani.social 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

An alarmingly high amount of pedos are Republican, I don't know why people feel the need to embellish that

[–] MHLoppy@fedia.io 3 points 2 days ago

Tribalism is a hell of a drug