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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Dependent_Board_378 on 2025-11-07 08:15:21+00:00.
Last night was supposed to be a chill college night. Wings, a few drinks, then back to the dorms. On the walk home my friend vanished. One second she was beside me, the next she wasn’t. I did a few fast laps around campus like a confused Roomba and kept moving until I spotted her: fully asleep inside a landscaping bush. Hair full of leaves. Out cold. I pulled her out, cleaned her up the best I could, and got us home like this was a normal Tuesday.
This morning we realized her keys were missing. I went back at sunrise and checked the same bush. The keys were dangling on a branch like a sad ornament. I grabbed them, went to class, and pretended none of it ever happened.
Lesson learned: stop after the second pitcher, and avoid bushes as sleeping arrangements.
TL;DR: Night out, lost my friend, found her asleep in a campus bush, went back at dawn and her keys were still hanging in the same bush.