I showed my friends this and reminded them I have a DNR (do not resuscitate)
this post was submitted on 01 Jan 2026
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Yeah if all it takes to keep me alive is a prostate massage, I'm taking that option.
Lol I've had a 5 hr NDE, it's the opposite of scary out there. If I'm not back again on my own I'm not intending to come back. My friends do know to not do an autopsy and wait until I actually show signs of decomp before they cremate me tho, just in case I'm gone more than 5 hrs next time. I read some shaman was gone 2 weeks in his village and was pissed when he woke up in the charnel house 😂
The prostate massage or the DNR?
The prostate massage. Might as well have a good time on my way out.
This made me laugh harder than it should
Haahaha, yay 😂
You need a DNAO (do not anally oxygenate)
Haha
I’m about to douche my hole daily now
Alternative title: "One day you may live for butt stuff"
"Brain farts" will take a whole new meaning!
It's not smoke but they're blowing
I learned about this from an awesome Hank Green video about how life evolved to move out of the ocean onto land. Developing air breathing lungs was one step in that, and it appears that lungs developed from stomachs. Any soft tissue with a lot of blood flowing through it close to the surface can absorb some oxygen. Some fish began to develops such sacs and use them to gulp and capture airborne oxygen. And he notes that there are some surgeries today where they may “aspirate the patient’s colon” with oxygen to keep their blood oxygen up when conventional breathing must be supplemented. Breathing through your ass is in fact a thing.
This is reminding me of the 'blood is imitation seawater' thread on tumblr. Hang on let me grab it.
Ok it's too long to copy and paste in full without hogging the thread (it's like 4 or 5 screen shots in length), so here's the first bit and a link to the rest.
https://www.tumblr.com/derinthescarletpescatarian/673446579329466368?source=share
Yeah exactly. Hank Green hints at this in the video title but skin is the biggest problem that had to be solved to move us onto land. How does one keep from drying out? It’s like we made a spacesuit for ourselves and now live in it.
Instead of O2 it's OO
Hamboning will save your life one day!
(All I could think when I read the title)
I think this is the best comment I've read this year.
So the best comment in the last 2 days
I think this is the best comment I've read this year.
The gape of life...
Cool!
Also something something sniffing your own farts idk.
No more like something something irrigation of the bowels (something I never thought I have to look up in English)
Your translator was like "what do you need this for?" 😂
I love the term, "self-directed excretion."