this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] Jyrdano@lemmy.world 88 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Holy shit a Morrowind meme out in the wild.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm a massive elder scrolls fan

[–] Jyrdano@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago

Didnt know Dwemer made those too

[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 60 points 3 months ago (1 children)

This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.

[–] M137@lemmy.world 18 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Absolutely loved that movie when I was a kid.
And I just now realised what was going on when I was around 15 and a girl invited me to her place while her parents were away. We watched this movie and she put her legs over me, then leaned her head on my shoulder and held my arm and I just sat there fully focused on the movie and feeling awkward about physical contact... God damn it.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 5 points 3 months ago

That's a perfectly fine thing to do at 15. Cuddling while watching a movie. I think you're just looking through it through a different lens now that you're (presumably) no longer a teenager.

[–] ZkhqrD5o@lemmy.world 47 points 3 months ago (4 children)

"The 30s are men's best years!"

Meanwhile:

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 21 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Husband hit stage 3 when he was 16, and is still there nearing 40.

#notallhairloss

[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 5 points 3 months ago

I got the fading widow's peak in my early twenties. And it hasn't progressed at all in like twenty years!

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

i've been in stage 3 vertex for a couple decades. been shaving it off for the last six or seven. is nice.

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 months ago

Yeah I've had a prominent widows peak since my hair grew in. Lot of comments about how I looked like Dracula or Eddie Munster. Got bad enough I tried shaving it in highschool, which honestly looked way way worse.

Morale of the story, men can have different hairlines that are not straight across. Just own it.

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2 points 3 months ago

My father is stage 3 at age 51. Interesting. Guess he will be stage 6 by 110.

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[–] b_tr3e@feddit.org 33 points 3 months ago (3 children)

To be fair, the guy on the picture is 700 years or older. I want to see you at that age.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 14 points 3 months ago

"When riddled with corprus and 700 years old you reach, look as good you will not!"

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[–] TwodogsFighting@lemdro.id 31 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Dudes got robot legs. How much more valuable do you want?

[–] WanderWisley@lemmy.world 22 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] 87Six@lemmy.zip 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh wow. Wild Wild West. They had the best burger king (or was it mcdonalds? p sure its bk) kids toys

[–] 87Six@lemmy.zip 4 points 3 months ago
[–] FooBarrington@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Jon Peters: heavy breathing

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 7 points 3 months ago

Metal legs; but is stuck in a hole filled with diseased zombie people.

[–] Jinarched@lemmy.ca 18 points 3 months ago

Peak dad bod

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Yagrum Bagarn, the only living Dwemer to appear in an Elder Scrolls game so far.

[–] Derpenheim@lemmy.zip 8 points 3 months ago (5 children)

Also the last living Dwemer. Motherfucker was in a different dimension when the Dwemer vanished

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Last living one we know of, at least.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 months ago (6 children)

Which in all honesty leaves a lot open for Bethesda to bring them back in some capacity. Between Dragon Breaks, Chim, and literal time travel there's a lot they could do not even getting into the other metaphysics and metamagics in the setting.

For those who haven't deep delved EUSP I shall list what the three things I listed implies.

Dragon Breaks, a dragon break is what happens when time becomes non linear the fun thing is that it can be both retroactive and postactive. The ending of Elder Scrolls 2 Daggerfall is sometimes theorized to have caused a dragon break so massive that it basically rewrote the setting with its shockwave. This is admittedly just an in universe way of explaining retcons.

Chim, basically a character in the setting achieves awareness that they are infact fictional and becomes effectively a god. Tuber Septum achieved partial Chim caused a dragon break and removed the jungles of Cyrodil from history. Also Vivec achieved Chim and Dagoth Ur fucked up the process without removing himself entirely.

Time travel, basically what it says on the tin. Fun fact Pelinal Whitestrake was from a different timeline and was basically the Terminator.

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[–] zd9@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago (2 children)

These are actual teenage boys now though. Gen Alpha is so fucked.

[–] realitaetsverlust@piefed.zip 2 points 3 months ago

Yeah but the good thing is that the gen after is probably not going to be equally retarded.

[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 6 points 3 months ago

What a grand and intoxicating bod!

[–] gon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 3 months ago
[–] stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago (2 children)

This is crazy; what game is this from?

[–] CmdrUlle@feddit.org 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago (19 children)

Oh! I think I've heard of it before. I'll look it up. For anybody who has played it: is it fun?

[–] noxypaws@pawb.social 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Morrowind remains my favorite Elder Scrolls game. It's a bit more hardcore RPG than Skyrim for sure, and that may turn some folks off. And it's definitely an older game with most of the dialog written. But it is an EXCEPTIONAL game. The world is beautiful and varied and exploration still feels more rewarding than Oblivion or Skyrim, the amount of lore to explore is HUGE,, the specificity when building and leveling your character out exactly how you want is expansive, and the game doesn't hold your hand - you can kill people who are vital to the main story if you want to, it just lets you doom the world if you really want to.

Nowadays, I'd strongly recommend running it with the excellent OpenMW engine, it's rock solid and performs better than the original game, hell there's even a working multiplayer fork of it!

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[–] SirActionSack@aussie.zone 4 points 3 months ago

It is amazing but it doesn't hold your hand as far as quests go. There's no big arrow pointing to your objective. Items don't blink or glow. You must read the quest journal and wander around. There's transport options but no generic fast travel.

Also, if you can find a mod to remove cliff racers then use it.

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[–] Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 4 points 3 months ago

I'll bet his poophole is mechanized as well.

You be nice, he's the hottest dwemer in all of Tamriel!

[–] HexesofVexes@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Get the new "Bagarn Bod" today with this simple trick doctors won't tell you!

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[–] Fedizen@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Sarah in the bible had Isaac at 90 years old. Menopause is a woke lie like dinosaurs. /s

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 months ago

Once women hit menopause they're experienced and can take all your creampies. IDK 'bout y'all, but I'd assign that great value.

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