this post was submitted on 03 Mar 2024
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Trans

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created a community for harmreduction purposes (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Xea@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/trans@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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Im really sorry for spamming this wonderful community, Please don’t be mad at me for wasting space in your thread 🥺

I just wanted to make people aware that I created a Harmreduction community on this instance(!harmreduction@lemmy.blahaj.zone) because I really think its something we need here, many trans people are turning to drugs, personally, I know more friends who are on “hard drugs” than are not, so I wanted to make a space on this instance for people to safely talk about harmreduction, reddit can be quite toxic and I feel the atmosphere here might be alot better and the people giving advice might be alot more informed already.

If you feel you can advice people, need advice or just occasionally enduldge, please join!

Also I am always there for anybody who needs advice, I am an intravenous polydrug user, amateur chemist, know a decent bit about injecting hormones right and even though I have puppy eyes, I don’t bite :)

Lots of love!, Xea

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[–] ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Timely. I have been considering resorting to (illicit) drug use lately.

I don't want to hurt my body, which I rather like as my transition progresses, I'm just tired of feeling so down all the time. As a hedonist by nature, I seek pleasures of all kinds. Being deprived of them, life has little meaning or value to me.

It's probably better if I could go socialize more (everyone tells me this), but that feels like an impossible challenge.

Sorry I'm not really going anywhere with this, just wanted to write out my thoughts on this and see how it feels to admit.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you can afford it, try to see a therapist instead. In the long run you'll probably save money doing that rather than using illicit drugs.

I used to sh frequently when I was younger. I got put on antidepressants and I've been a lot better since. I think it'd be really beneficial for you to have even just one session with a therapist.

[–] ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The thing is, I love my therapist, but we are at the phase where I am supposed to like, go socialize. Just do it. Like flipping a magic switch. But I went nowhere and could hardly stay awake the past 3 days, despite antianxiety and antidepressant meds. When they work, it's great, when they don't, it's hell. I'm in hell rn. Under a mountain of accumulating shit.

I have never been able to figure this out in 40 years. And rather than dwelling on that, and my probable future (bleak), I kinda just want a distraction tbh.

[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I had that same issue. My therapist wanted me to go socialize and for months I couldn't do it. I got increasingly depressed and eventually couldn't deal with it anymore and I said fuck this, I'm tired of feeling this way. So I decided that I was going to socialize in the next opportunity I got.

Idk if this happens to you, but when I'm depressed I become extremely nihilistic and that gives me a huge confidence boost. It puts me in a mindset where I feel like nothing matters, and that also temporarily gets rid of my insecurities. I would go and talk to people while in this state and I was a bit awkward at first, but eventually I got the hang of it, and I've built up a lot of confidence by doing that.

I think one of the big things for me is that for a long time I've always wanted to feel in control. Anxiety is caused by the fear of the unknown and being in control eliminates the unknown. The thing is though, you're never really going to be in control. Accepting that I am not in control and just letting go has helped me significantly. Now I feel like I'm just along for the ride that the universe is taking me on and life's been a lot more enjoyable since I made that realization.

[–] ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

Oh wow, no I don't get a confidence boost from depression, really it's the opposite. I start to eat away at myself, criticizing where I am, what I'm doing, who I am, etc. It's a bad cycle.

All the nihilism with none of the perks I guess lol

I think one of the big things for me is that for a long time I've always wanted to feel in control.

This part resonates the most with me. I absolutely "need" to be in control. That's part of why I always avoided drugs, even alcohol. Why I spend so much time thinking before acting. Maybe part of why I avoid people. Meeting my partner introduced a lot of spontaneity in my life, after all they are a major influence that I can't control. I started to relax my expectations, I'm not quite carefree or "along for the ride" just yet, but more flexible than I was.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

As someone who's struggled with something similar, routine is a godsend. I highly recommend joining some kind of club, class, or event that's once every week or so. It's a lot easier to make yourself socialize if you get into a routine. Plus, you might meet some cool people.

Force yourself to go at least once to something interesting. Just once. If you don't like the vibe, you can zip on out of there, but you'll have made an attempt, which is much better than nothing. If you like it, then you've got something you can look forward to and is predictable.

I promise you, even if you feel meh about the people, socialization is going to help you feel better. Human brains are hardwired to be social, and will give you the happy chemical for doing it. As hard as it is, the people telling you to socialize more are right. I learned it the hard way.

[–] Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

Thank you. I feel like I'm at a point where I've worked really hard to learn about myself and I work really hard to engage in things and get value out of them that... Yea I'm ready to put the effort into creating routine and trying social situations that I might not like.

[–] ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

For sure. I have my weekly therapy appointments, one for mental health and one for voice. And the mood lift I get just from seeing a familiar face, being outside, conversing, it's remarkable... if short-lived. Once I return to my dungeon of a home, I'm down again.

Same at work, I made a friend recently and we talked every chance we got -- until I was off work and she transferred.

So I know for a fact that routine socialization helps me.

What honestly scares me off about new experiences is all the negativity I feel when comparing myself to others. Always in my mind, I can't compare, I'm just not good enough (I know, it's not true). I wish I could be social like them, beautiful like them, talented like them, belong like them.

And I'm not good with nonverbal cues and communication. I think I give the wrong vibes sometimes, and misinterpret others. I find people... very confusing.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I dunno if this'll help, but almost everyone you compare yourself to doesn't have all their shit together and are trying to figure things out too. Nobody's got a perfect life, some are just better at hiding it than others.

Also, see if you can sniff out some other neurodivergent people. My best friendships have come from neurodivergent people. Might be easier to navigate friendships that way.

[–] ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

That is what my therapist says. It's true, and it's rational way of looking at things.

But damn. When I think about living alone, and I see and hear so many people who live with their s/o or roommates, I don't care in how many other ways their life may be a dumpster fire. Some needs are just basic and common to practically everyone (even if they don't realize that). Just one example - my life has many... deficiencies.

I'm working on it. Tomorrow I meet a local trans woman who I might move in with as a roommate <3

[–] Xea@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

BAD HARMREDUCTION ADVICE:

uiy, I feel like If I give you my honest opinon I might do alot of harm but I was in a very similar spot that you were a year or so ago, I used to have alot of issues socializing because I was afraid and didn't have the convidence to say the things on my mind and I couldn't process well enough

unless you are injecting highly contaminated drugs you shouldn't be doing significant damage to yourself, some stimulants have strong cardiovascular effects you should be aware of especially if you are in danger of having a stroke(like me)

something which really just helped me was taking very controlled amounts of prescription amphetamine since I have ADHD, it helped me form friendships that today I could not do without

but I want to warn you, while most drugs are not as harmful as they are depicted as in the media and so on, you don't want to reach a state where you are permanently chasing a high which you already are not able to feel anymore because you abused your substance of choice for too long, just slighly amp your life up and don't even think you can be in euphoria for the rest of your life if you just keep using

[–] ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well I've kinda managed it with alcohol. Every now and then I have a few drinks to feel better and fall asleep. And it works actually, I feel so happy and carefree. I'll sleep 7-8 hrs without waking or dreaming. Even the next day feels good. Then I don't need it again. Works for the occasional bad night. Definitely helps me in social contexts.

But yeah I see your point about addiction or chasing euphoria. I can't even imagine what other drugs are like, so I guess it's partly curiosity too. Most likely I won't try any hard drugs, I did ask my partner to bring me some cannabis products to try (gummies or edibles, not a smoker).

[–] Xea@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

honestly, I would say there is some "hard drugs" I take which are alot more harmless than alcohol, I know people always think our staple drugs are safe, but trust me, I have nearly died because I swallowed a dozen caffeine pills in an manic-episode

my reason for saying amphetamine made me friendships is that it makes me feel more like myself, I can think better not worse, Im confident and enpathic, it quite honestly seams like the reason Im not alone currently

don't know about cannabis as it has not worked for me this far regardless of how fat the joints I smoke are, but I think that sounds like a good and safe idea!

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do your research before partaking in any drug, because all drugs have risks attached to them. It's just like with prescription drugs, you research the risks and benefits and decide which outweighs the other. You can do significant harm to yourself if you don't do your research.

Use good sources such as peer reviewed journals for your primary sources because they are backed up by science. Reddit and Lemmy are likely to give you inaccurate information, so it's wise to use them only when there's little scientific research for the drug you're researching (which is somewhat of a red flag in itself, because you don't know all of what you're getting into).

There are many risks and interactions that come with almost any drug out there that you've got to be aware of before taking anything. Supplements, genetic risk factors, and lifestyle risk factors need to be taken into consideration.

Not saying all drugs are bad, but all I'm saying is that they're drugs at the end of the day and as such they aren't to be taken lightly. There can be benefits to using them, but also significant drawbacks.

Do your research, use good judgement, listen to your body, and know your limits.

Illicit (and legal) drugs aren't a good first option if you're experiencing problems in your life. Therapy, exercise, building a support network, etc. are much more likely to be helpful long term than drugs are. They're better off being used as a last resort when all other options have been exhausted.

If you're in significant distress, Trevor Project offers free 24/7 crisis counseling for LGBTQ people.

https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help/

[–] Xea@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Thank you alot for this great bit of advice!, I do have to say while getting information from reddit and lemmy is not ideal, you also can't expect the average drug user to read papers and its not like the mainstream media/authorities/or schools are providing atequate harmreduction information

ps: if there is any bit of information/resource I should add anywhere, feel free to tell me!

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's a real helpful book out there called something alone the lines of "The Drug User's Bible." Might not be the exact title...lemme see if I can find a PDF of the book somewhere. Think it had a purple cover. I remember it being a great harm reduction resource.

[–] Xea@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

ooo I heard of that one... I might have seen a girl snort lines of it but that is besides the point :3

if you want I can add it, will also add the trevorproject link you provided! / I can also add you as a mod since you seam to be invested in this topic

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago

Lmao. That's one way to be introduced to a book.

Found a copy on archive.org:

https://archive.org/details/the-drug-users-bible-harm-reduction-dominic-milton-trott

[–] falling_deeper42@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Make sure to add links to erowid.org and tripsit.me plz

[–] Xea@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

ooo, good call!