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Hey Jesus, what REALLY happened with the fig tree? (slrpnk.net)

submitted 2 months ago by wolfyvegan@slrpnk.net to c/askjesus@hilariouschaos.com

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I've heard a few variations of a story in which you had an altercation with a fig tree. I doubt that an upstanding saviour such as yourself would get upset without just cause, so what really happened between you and that tree? Is the slogan "Jesus Hates Figs" just hyperbole, or is there something nefarious going on with fig trees in general? Do you have any other fruit recommendations? Thanks in advance for clearing this up!

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[–] Jesus_Christ@hilariouschaos.com 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Oh, I remember that. Good times.

What ended up happening, is i gave the fig tree the ability to speak. And turns out? That fig tree was racist towards the Eskimo people.

I tired talking sense into it, but to no avail. So yea, not my fondest memory. As for fruit recommendations, I recommend strawberries. Their less sassy and great for your skin.

✨️✨️ peace, love, roller skating ✨️✨️