this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2025
16 points (94.4% liked)
Melbourne
2111 readers
38 users here now
This community is a place created for the people of Melbourne and Victoria. We are a positive, welcoming and inclusive community. We might not agree about everything, but we always strive to stay civil and respectful.
The focus of our discussions is based around things that affect Victoria, but we are also free to discuss our local perspective on wider issues. Or head to the regular Daily Random Discussion thread to talk about anything.
Ongoing discussions, FAQs & Resources (still under construction)
Adoption Certificate for Nellie, the Daily Thread numbat (with thanks to @Catfish)
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
yo, just in case you weren't aware that was an arsehole response from your father.
You hear a family member scream in the middle of the night you tend to go kicking in doors and if they sleepin', you disrupt that bad dream stat
I'm tempted to start another account just so I can upvote this a second time.
I had to read the comment a few times before I could understand it, because a father hearing his daughter screaming in the night and not running in straight away to find out what is wrong and providing comfort just didn't make sense to me. Actually berating her for it is just appalling behaviour.
@LowExperience2368@aussie.zone the only question to ask here is WTF is wrong with your father, you have absolutely no reason to feel guilty.
This has happened about five times before, so they know not to run in.
The guilt is because I did something that meant no one could fall back asleep.
Yeah, what you do in your sleep isn't really your fault. Don't let this weigh too heavily on you. Consider therapy, or meditation or sleep health stuff because screaming from sleep is an issue that you're responsible for but not at fault for, if that makes sense.
Thanks :)
I'll do a meditation tonight and see how that goes. I think the screaming happens at peak stress levels. Will also check in with the GP when I go in next because I do wake up with a blocked nose quite often (probably from stomach sleeping, but could be something else).
Yo, wtf, you literally had no control over it! Sure it is frustrating for them - I get irrationally triggered by the sounds of snoring - but it is peak asshole behaviour to then make you feel guilty about it. It's not even like there are known interventions (like with snoring). They should instead be concerned for you and supporting you to get to the root of it (which benefits you AND them). Please don't feel guilty about this!!! e: as SaneMartigan says, you can be responsible for it but not be guilty. Taking ownership absolutely does mean recognising what things are out of your control and if your family just expects you to magically investigate every avenue and work it out (without even being concerned for you, wtf) that is really cold.
I donβt think you should feel guilty about it at all.
Itβs something you canβt help and youβre never awake to it and your family already knows about it.
Lol you didn't do it on purpose, that's the point. If you stayed up until 3am and screamed then I could see how you'd be to blame. But you were asleep, friend, you can't control what happens when you're asleep.
You don't need to do anything or apologise, I get ya dad is mad but like, you don't need to berated for this, and you don't need to shoulder the blame!
Edit to add: your dad is acting like a nob, so please try not to take what he says to heart π
Thanks, I think he was just tired and the emotional regulation went brrr.
Yep, I agree.