this post was submitted on 05 Oct 2025
72 points (100.0% liked)

Ask Lemmy

34942 readers
1503 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Excepting reciprocal interest in you

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] s@piefed.world 4 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

The condescension and man-splaining thing is difficult and is definitely a trained part of a male-dominated culture/sub-culture if it is based on prejudice. The chainsaw incident might have come from a genuine place of concern and caution since power tools can be dangerous, even variants of tools somebody has experience with. I personally struggle with gauging my expectations of how familiar any random person would be with something I’m bringing up, especially if it’s something I’ve had other people confused by in the past. I usually say “Have you heard of X?” or “How familiar are you with X?” to try to avoid either scenario of my audience thinking that I’m condescending them or them being lost about a subject they know nothing about.

[–] Ceedoestrees@lemmy.world 7 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago)

I know and understand where it comes from, but I don't want to deal with it in a partner.

The chainsaw thing was absolutely because I'm a chick and representative of his overall attitude toward me that evening. Asking if I'd used a chainsaw would have been appropriate, or a quick rundown on starting/stopping would have been fine.

Basically, I ask myself if he would have said the same thing in the same way to a man. I've worked on enough jobsites to know that no, that doesn't happen.