Ask Lemmy

Okay here's another one and this does not describe all of my potential dating partners, but a big amount of them.

People who have kids and declare that the kids are their whole lives; people who do not have kids, but talk about their dog like it's their baby.

It's wonderful to love your kids, and it's wonderful to bond with your dog, but to define your entire being around those is so unhealthy.

Many parents whose kids are already in university, and don't want much to do with them can often not let go. Often will spend their entire weekend fretting about their daughter or son who doesn't even want to talk to them and won't reply to their messages. Get on with life, lady. Get one actually.

And I love dogs, and I've tried to set aside and compromise on the "my dog is my baby" mentality, but it always comes down to that person being so completely disconnected from their own emotional core, you can never actually know them.

Someone who actually cares about me enough to help me with the things I suck at. Someone who would drop everything they are doing if I needed them, the way I do for everyone I care about. Someone who thinks I am sexy and wants to be physically intimate. Someone I am comfortable enough around to be myself and not mask to fit in.

What my current relationship is lacking is he's not as available as I would like, we don't talk about deep personal shit, and we don't really have sex. Basically just friends that cuddle and sleep in the same bed on occasion.

Main problem is I want more, and he doesn't know what he wants. But I'd rather keep what we have than have nothing at all. We're not monogamous so I've just been thinking about maybe simply adding more people than trying to find one that ticks every box. Plus it would be fun to say shit like "My Monday and Tuesday boyfriends are hanging out with my Wednesdsy girlfriend, which is why I'm just chilling with Thursday, even though it's Monday."

I was never in a relationship and am very awkward in social interaction so I would probably want someone who will be patient with me and be alright with random info dumps/sharing YouTube videos about random tech and such.

I don't have current options.

I want someone who shares my hatred of apple and companies in general. A fediverse user who is smart and has common sense. On top of that I would also like someone who doesn't mind that im socially awkward and terrible at one on one conversations.

scales, wings, a tail, and the ability to breath fire tbh

Creative, fun and encouraging. Emotionally mature, respectful, and commited to ongoing self improvement. Everything else is peripheral, but bonus points for writers and artists who are into pc gaming and technology.

My biggest issue has been men socialized with some kind of bias against women, who don't examine their need to protect and try to make decisions for me. I'm pansexual but lean toward people with dicks.

I learned how to use power tools when I was seven, I'm mechanically inclined, and built my own PC at eighteen. There are an unfortunate number of men who will start a conversation with me from a place of condescension. The last date I went on, he showed me his chainsaw, I asked to try it out and what he said started with "Okay, well it can be a little scary at first because it's loud..." Another guy told me I was cracking eggs wrong when I made breakfast. I used to be a head chef.

They need to be local or willing to help me move to them.

Online relationships are nice but I wanna cuddle. 😭

Human decency. Most of my dates are souless corporate drones who are completely selfishly absorbed in chasing the dragon of materialism, while spouting spiritualistic new age buzzwords about how they value 'experiences' while they are spending 130% of their pay on luxury lifestyle living and are deeply unhappy and are solely looking for a male provider so they can quit their job and maintain their lifestyle.

They are often openly sexist, racist, and disgusting focused on appearances above all else. Everything is chasing brands and projecting an image of 'success' despite how rotten they are on the inside.

The last decent human being I met on a date was years ago. It was an immigrant woman who was a nurse who was supporting her family. She was so kind, thankful, and decent. I was not attracted to her but I meet about 35 of the above types of ladies for every decent one I meet who actually is living for someone other than personal 'hedonism' and needing weekly therapy to 'survive' the 'difficulties' of their sad little rich girl lives.

When I am talking with them, I want to feel like I am having a conversation with ChatGPT.

You all have options??

The last woman I was chatting with turned out to be anti-vax. So, not that.

I'm gender fluid, I describe myself as 70% male, 30% female gender identity. I'm straight.

I am exhausted by women continually declaring what they want in men, but not really wanting that. I simply cannot act obsessive, possessive, or dominant. I want a woman to approach me on an equal footing. It continually shocks me how women demand toxic behavior in a dating context.

Options, I'm entirely socially isolated.

Depressive intellectual honesty is #1.

No children ever #2. I didn't like children even when I was one and that never changed. My sense of morality also disagrees with procreation.

No deity beliefs or vague spiritualism #3.

That's it really, and yet I've barely ever met anyone like this. People don't exactly advertise these traits that I've seen local to me.

Edit: Oh and as far as physical goes I'm not body picky. It's mostly about the face. I like angular, resting bitch face. Intensity. If you scare people I'm into it.

Mostly free time to meet in person. Busy professional looking for busy professional gets difficult.