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Dang, it's pretty common behavior, unfortunately. I've been guilty of it.
You've recognized your manipulating behavior; that means you can change it.
It doesn't sound like you should interact with this woman you're referring to any more, because an apology may not help her with what's already happened and being around you at all could upset her more.
But the world is big and keeps going on. You could try to make amends by being supportive and helpful to other people, even those you don't know yet, counter your negative experiences with positive ones.
Maybe one day after you're more in control of those manipulative tendencies, the opportunity will come up for you to apologize.
If it doesn't, it doesn't, but you can become a positive experience in people's lives going forward, regardless.
fuck, yeah....too late for that, just edited my post with more info. didnt think you'd respond so quickly
If it goes through, it goes, if it doesn't it doesn't.
If you've already upset her enough that she's cut contact, she likely won't respond either way.
And either way, you can let her get back to her life and try to become a positive experience in other people's lives going forward.
thankfully they live on other side of country, so we really should never run into each other again unless the fates deem it so.
it was kind of a "girl from highschool i had always wanted to ask out, but never had the confidence to"-scenario. childhood trauma from my time at that school made me remember it, and eventually her, so I looked her up...see how she was doing, noticed she was still single, figured I'd take my shot. let my emotions get the best of me I guess (really got to be cognizant of these acid flashbacks, till the trauma is all worked through)...
Now you know!
You took a shot, didn't hit it's done, somewhere in there is something you can use to positive effect in the future.
lol for sure.
like reminding myself i'm almost 30, can't be approaching woman like a highschooler. been out of the game too long i guess
Yup. Great point.