this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2026
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I'm sorry but this is not what makes me laugh. I think this is what is broken in the relationships. I mean why women has to be the passive role every single time? It's like im not ugly, and actually when I talk with them It goes well. My critic is why I have to start every single fckng time?
Uh... have you been around for the last thirty or so years? Apparently accosting women is harassment these days, so it's less hassle to wait for women to do the first step, I guess.
Wow. You just made me realize accosting has a completely different definition than I thought for the past 25 years. God damn it that's upsetting.
You made me check and apparently it's a bit more aggressive in English than in French. Now I'm curious what you thought it meant.
I basically thought it was a synonym for "assaulted." Which is like explicitly violent. Like I was WAY off. Which is rare for me, I had like 750/800 on my SAT verbal. 99/100 on my NYS English Regents exams. That's so embarrassing to me.
Now I have to algorithmically sift though the memories of my life to see if I'm relying on that definition for any important logical frameworks that my autistic brain uses to do my thinking.
Because women are in higher demand than men. That's the sad truth. Women do make the first move, maybe more than you realize, but they all tend to go for the same top 1% of men. If you aren't that, then you've gotta do some work, either to chase them or to become the top 1% that they chase. It's a sad reality but that's what it is.
I don't know if everyone has been paying attention to how things are trending and extrapolating, but the fact is a ton of men are looking at that scenario and saying, "eh I'm just done, I'm gonna stay home and enjoy the peace and quiet while it lasts. Less risky."
If that works for them then they can do that. I think if most left the house and tried chasing girls IRL rather than online that they'd be pretty successful once they practiced a bit. As an older man, young women seem a lot more thirsty than they ever were when I was young.
A lot of men think differently than women about relationships though. A lot of men would:
Fundamentally know they would be happiest with a woman who respects them and treats them softly and with love and treats the relationship as a partnership.
Concurrently, they would be happy to accept sex if it were freely offered with no risks (but there ARE very clear risks that sometimes make them balk at sex even being worth that anyway).
They believe that past behavior predicts future behavior. They see women that they would sleep with but never marry.
End result: the men willing to take the risk sleep with all the women they want to. Women all sleep with that shared small group of men. Those men don't commit, they have all the sex they want and never intended to commit. The men that would have committed were friend zoned, turned down, or ignored, took that at face value as they are not valued or in demand. Ultimately choose a peaceful life as a hermit enjoying whatever they can find happiness in. Hobbies, games, friends, etc.
Is selection bias a term or did I just make that up? Perhaps women get an incomplete understanding of men because they only interact with the men they choose to interact with. At minimum I know confirmation bias definitely comes into play with all these social interactions and assumptions. And men get an incomplete picture of women just from sheer lack of exposure. They only know what they see using what limited means of remote study. Social media, news, anecdotes from each other, etc.
In my experience, the men who hook up a lot also generally end up settling down. The ones who don't, don't.
That sounds like you're saying "it is what it is." Which I agree with.
I was a bit hyperbolic, you're right, I apologize. They do settle down when they want to, on their time scale, but their preferences also correlate with other parameters that should be considered.
The higher social status, the more selective the man who has been pursued by women gets to be. He may say to himself I prefer a younger woman that has fewer relationships, and thus a real statistically relevant lower risk of having had traumatic experiences and the resulting damage that may affect her ability to trust him and view him through an adversarial lens.
Look at DiCaprio. People can balk all they want at the age gap thing, but consenting adults gonna bang. And he gets to be as selective as he wants and he'll never not have options.
But my ADHD has made me forget what point I was even trying to make. Sorry I ramble often.
Edit ok now that I went and re read the post I can get back to topic.
So that's my take on the men that hook up a lot. Now the other side!
The men who don't hook up don't get married. Yeah, that makes sense to me. They are too afraid to do what it takes. And honestly I think that's coming from a pervading sense of hopelessness that is growing and growing amongst that demographic. And extrapolating that further, worries me greatly. Fear leads to anger leads to Yoda was right leads to shit is on fire yo!
because gender roles.
you aren't a 'man' and she isn't a 'woman' outside of these roles. they are arbitrary rules, but people have deep emotional belief in them.
I agree with you. But we have to start changing anytime...
So... Let's change. They do more damage than good
i can change myself. I can't change other people. Other people seem to be embracing 1950s gender shit more and more.