This is so very much me. I'm not missing your signals, I just ACTUALLY "hate playing games" like you claim to do and I'm already checked out.
this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2024
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Don't be mean. I promise to do my best to judge that fairly.
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I really appreciate when people announce what they hate, so I can expect exactly that from them. Really helps out with those social cues. "Yes, Brenda, we know you hate drama; sucks that it follows you around like a fart cloud. I'm sure it was the dog."
1,000%
Yes, ignoring something is sure to convey the much-needed lesson. A classic maneuver. Timeless. So effective. 🤌🏽
People use this tactic against autistic people all the time so it's easy to see how it gets internalized. So many situations where it's like "Oh, they know what this means and Im not going to humor them by explaining it, so I'm just going to pretend they know what everything means." It's very tempting to flip. As a teenager I definitely said "use your words like an adult" to adults, especially the types that would pull that reverse bullshit themselves.
Literally half of "social cues" are pretending not to acknowledge something and hoping that leaving it unsaid draws attention to it.
The other half is ignoring something in order to not draw attention to it. An old book on manners said something like, one says "excuse me" for a burp, but if the gas emerges in the other direction, no one is to acknowledge it happened.
Me when people start pointing to show me where something is. Stop pointing, actually tell me where it is
Just sniff that hand when they start pointing. That's what my dog does.
You adapt to us now. 😏
"Look in my eyes, I am the social norms now. Now stop looking me in the eyes."
When I get belligerent, social cues be damned! Though I have issues telling the right thing to do. I’ve gotten better at this overtime, but it’s not hard for people to sus me out as a non-normie.
Weirdly common for neurovanillas not to develop some basic social skills and everyone around them just kinda accommodates them