this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2024
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Bωockchain

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bwockchain is not a technology of the future, buttcoin is a scam.

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[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 31 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

I'm trying to envision the panic as crypto bros can't get into their online wallets.

I'm going to stick with my strategy of growing barley and running a still. Pretty sure I'll have something men will give me their firstborn to obtain. Then I'll use my army of drunken, mutated postwar babies to take over the tampon factories, and gain the support of the other half of humanity.

[–] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Do you think you could expand into corn mash? Asking for a friend.

[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'll need 3 nights a week with his wife.

[–] Lepsea@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago

You know what I'm going to make my own plantation with blackjack and hookers

[–] lightnegative@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Corn is an absolute b*stard to mash compared to malted barley.

Id stick with the barley. But you'll need time for that to grow and harvesting without technology would be a lot of work, so actually stockpile a few tonnes of sugar so you can make neutral spirit for gin and Molotov cocktails in the meantime

[–] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's why you have local wallets...

[–] lightnegative@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You still need the network to process transactions; if the internet is down then your local wallet is unspendable unless you create a local side chain with your own nodes and get everyone who wants to transact with you on board.

Then the apocalypse must continue because you'd never be able to reattach to the main chain

[–] lurch@sh.itjust.works 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Ferengi rule of acquisition #34: War is good for business

[–] Beryl@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Business yes, but crypto? I struggle to imagine anything that could be of less value in times of war.

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago

Business, as in, selling goods and services.

[–] Hildegarde@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Cryptocurrency is the only thing to save you from the very specific apocalypse in which society crumbles but somehow the internet and the electrical grid keeps working.

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Which is why they are all in on space internet. The world may have crumbled away, but at least the Whales and bots can make number go up.

[–] BaumGeist@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

Egg Helms looks odd in this pic