Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.
No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
Vaush posts go in the_dunk_tank
Dunk posts in general go in the_dunk_tank, not here
Don't post low-hanging fruit here after it gets removed from the_dunk_tank
I did not expect this this post of mine to attract as many people minimising SA as it did. Bit of a downer, yeah.
For the past few weeks there have been multiple people on here really showing their asses by upvoting or commenting outright incel shit on various posts. This has convinced me that Hexbear needs another fucking purge.
i feel like tensions about dating and romance have really begun boiling up the past few years in general. there was a short period a few years ago where i thought incel-ism was dying out as an identity, but these days it seems bigger than its ever been
Ngl, there’s been a lot of iffy shit over the last couple months that have been making me rethink being here. If it weren’t for the absolute amazing trans community, I probably would’ve left. A portion of the men on this site make me horrendously uncomfortable and really are just solidifying why I will probably never date or hook up with a man even though I’m pan. Men terrify me now.
name and shame tbh. we must prepare another purge
I’m gonna try and do this next time that shit happens. As noted, it makes me uncomfortable and I kinda just lose all sense about what to do in the moment. So I tend to just try and ignore the thread after I see what’s going on so to avoid the severe discomfort I feel.
yeah a lot of people used to talk about SV a lot just off the cuff in jokes and news and memes and i think over time ive been able to get people to realize this isnt ok and now most posts are properly tagged, though i do usually end up reporting one or two each week, particularly from newcomers and fediverse people.
it is generally kinda wild how cis men often have no comprehension about why so many women avoid a wide swathe of internet spaces and activities
Loading HE, call out targets
Thankfully the mods are good people and things like this are usually dealt with pretty quickly
This might be controversial but I'm gonna say it: it sucks that women/femmes are less safe than men/masc are, it sucks that this means they have to be so careful all the time about things guys don't even think about, it sucks that our society doesn't take their safety or seeking their justice seriously, and we aught to be doing something systemically to address all of those issues.
Sorry you experienced that. I had not heard of that meme before reading that thread you linked. I'll say as an male-presenting person, it definitely doesn't feel good to have people assume that you are inherently dangerous for reasons that are out of your control. That's where the instinct to minimize comes from, I think.
But that's how it is, unfortunately. That's the consequence of living under patriarchy, and if a guy doesn't like it then they should assist in dismantling it rather than trying to dismiss its harms.
I heard a coworker today talk about almost getting kidnapped on a Tinder date, with the dude stalking her to her job and following her home. Just horrifying stuff. It's so pervasive but as a guy I don't encounter it until I hear stories like this and realize how dangerous it is out there for women and femmes alike. So, as much as I made jokes in the thread about gay bears, I get the point. It's not safe out there.
It’s wild how someone will say the words “true crime brain” and just completely black out that they just said the word “true”. Like those horrific things happened because real men did them.
true crime is often railroading and always exploitation.
that doesn't take away from #yesallwomen or give us an ability to tell who's a predator by looking but i have something very specific in mind when i hear "true crime brain" and the truth got nothing to do with it.
I try to avoid talking about SA on the internet because men with fragile egos will always find it and share their horrible takes in which they are the victims. I didn’t really expect hexbear to be an exception but I’m still sad to see it confirmed
men with fragile egos will always find it and share their horrible takes in which they are the victims.
I HATE THIS.
Own what you did, fuckboys. You were monstrous. Own up to it.
I know I did vile shit when I was young, and I spent the next three quarters of my life trying to make a world that doesn't create another Me. I don't go jack myself off on social media to make myself feel better about it.
I saw the worst fucking takes around this in a facebook "leftist" group, so many "not all men" telling women to shut up and touch grass, because obviously talking about abuse and being mistrusting of men is "hysterical" and "permanently online". I thought I had stumbled onto 4chan by mistake.
the worst ones were probably spouting literal right-wing racist shit about immigrant men being overrepresented to le epicly troll those evil misandrist women.
fucking disgraceful
proof that an iron hand is needed to crush deeply unserious 'leftists' like this
telling women to shut up and touch grass, because obviously talking about abuse and being mistrusting of men is "hysterical" and "permanently online"
Which is ironic considering the reason women learn to be hyper vigilant is because of the real world experiences they've had.
yeah that shit was pretty yikes. just another example of how even people who are on board with us most of the time still have serious brainworms to exorcise.
Going purely by DV statistics and rape culture, yeah I pick the bear too.
It's agonising to know that I can scare women just by existing in an area/place they don't expect. And that's not their fault, they're just protecting themselves. It's our society that has made it this way.
Yeah it's important to remember that women don't hate men when they point out SA. It's more of a "please listen to us this isn't cool" than a "fuck you you are horrible and should feel bad".
im mostly joking but unironically i think greater than 50% of men are vile and need to be forcibly de-brainwormed
Okay, but, have you considered: what about ethics in gaming journalism? reakky makes u thikn
But more importantly have you considered the feelings of me, a white man? 
I'll admit I made a smartass comment or two on social media (even here) about bears being able to run really fast 
But fuck's sake how do you not listen to people reiterating the point again and again that it's a thought exercise meant to make you figure out why the bear is their choice and actually listen
I'd imagine that chuds will be puffing their chests after this with "I'm scarier than a bear", but I guess the men saw the question more of "would she rather be in a forest with a bear or with you" and felt mogged by a 300 kilogram hairy animal.
Shrinking into a corn cob over the fact that woman would literally rather be torn to shreds by a bear than spend time with them
Men: build up for centuries being dangerous and tendency to domination of others as a virtue 'non-dangerous non-overly-confident men are not real men!!!'
Also men: 'how dare you call me "dangerous"!? I am very offended, boo-hoo!'
Also, not on this site, but I have seen women's complaints of sexism be disregarded in supposedly-leftist spaces, such as in threads authored by them and dedicated to them saying that they are excluded from various hobbies/spaces where some people commented 'nobody is complaining about being excluded!'
I saw it yesterday shortly after Read_Fanon had made that lovely response, and I felt good about the comments! I didn't realize it had taken a turn until I saw this post, and there were 100+ new comments 😳 aaaaaahhhhhh
True Crime Brain got me down, I GUESS 😮💨😤🤦😭
.
Disappointing yet not surprising, I've noticed guys on here having exceptionally cringe takes for a while.
I was talking with a parent some time ago. Her daughter was really sweet and sociable with everyone. She expressed some concern that she was struggling with finding a way to limit / curtail / correct (I don't remember the exact wording) that behavior because it wasn't always safe. At the time, I was thinking more about how crime is hyper focused in media so I pushed back a bit and said I didn't think it was something she should worry about and it was great that her daughter was so outgoing and friendly. I discussed it with a friend and she reminded me that I'm a self-absorbed dude who's never had to worry about that and I really regret saying it.
If I could apologize to that parent now (maybe I'll see her again idk) I'd say that it sucks that our society makes being such a wonderful person like her daughter so hazardous. I gave it 0 thought and talked out of my ass 
My wife told me about that meme question something like last week and I'd pretty much forgotten about it.
I forget sometimes how people can't step outside of themselves and see things from a more "big picture" or systemic perspective and get stuck personalizing the issue with a need to turn into a debate bro about it.
Damn I missed the original post and meme entirely and was wondering where the c/cth snowclones were coming from and upvoting just thinking they were some HB riff. I'm reading through now and will self-crit. Thanks for raising this.
The lingering parts of patriarchy are the hardest to dismantle. Like I try real hard to not use sexist words but then I see a guy whine on the jobsite "oh what a b-" and I gotta catch myself. I'd never call a woman that word but that instinct is still there when I see a man who can't hack it. It's dumb but it's a real struggle to unlearn it.
It's sad, because when I see it I know that when I was younger, I wouldn't have been as rabid as right wing weirdos, but I would've 'gone to bat' and been all contrarian about it, pointing out how 
'actually the comparison isn't valid' and so on... And in my own head I never meant it badly, but I sort of knew I was a misogynist at the same time? It's weird, the contradictions our brains are able to reconcile.
In some ways it comforts me that I and many others 'escape', but that was in a time of a very sexist undercurrent, with corners of the internet being true 'incel' shit. These days with all the manfluencers, it's not just Steven Crowder or whoever the fuck that no one who's touched grass knows about. It's shit that 'normal' people engage with more often. That said, I think things are marginally better now - there's some things you really 'cant say' anymore. But there's a lot you can, and I sometimes get the feeling we could be sliding backwards.
Furthermore, although I escaped, there's always a holdover. I think a lot of people escape rabid sexism, but don't continue to critique from there, because the world is so sexist in general. It's not hard to be less sexist than most men, while at the same time being very sexist.
I’d like to apologize for my own bad takes and ignorance. I’m trying to piece apart my thoughts on it and why I have so much trouble with this one. I’ve read through replies to my comments and other effort posts in the comments multiple times.
Would chose over a man or any other type of bear, sorry not sorry.