This type of bs is exactly why none of my apps are allowed to send me notifications.
this post was submitted on 23 Dec 2025
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To be fair, many list apps are also reminder apps.
The real tragedy of this story is that he likely can't use the back of a receipt anymore because they're all covered in advertisements
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Notifications are the way an app reminds me it needs to be immediately uninstalled.
My Spotify wrapped was a reminder that I barely used it at all this year. Thanks for the heads up that I need to cancel that subscription 👌
Apps on my phone have a one-strike rule: the moment they send me an ad or otherwise annoy me, notifications are disabled and I reevaluate whether I need that app installed in the first place.
The best part is when they purposely use only one notification channel, so you either have to disable all of them or none of them. And it's not because they don't know you can make multiple channels, nope, it's because some product manager figured out there's a higher rate of delivery for marketing notifications if they don't let users have fine-grained control. Metrics above all else 👑
(Read this in a David Attenborough voice)
And here, we see the product manager in its natural habitat, the office boardroom. Although dark and desolate, it provides the product manager with one its most critical resources: the whiteboard. The average product manager goes through two whiteboards every meeting, and this one is no exception. Thankfully, it is well-prepared for the quarterly meeting, having found a boardroom with four whole whiteboards.
But, not all is perfect for this product manager. The natural enemy of the product manager—the project manager—has sensed activity in the boardroom. In their natural habitat, it's a constant struggle between product manager and project manager. A fight between metrics: user, or developer. Luckily for our product manager, it's not its first encounter with a project manager.
The intruding project manager takes a sip of its coffee, demanding a higher share of the metrics for its lines of code. A notification channel is 6 extra lines, and that can make the life-or-death difference between the project manager's quarterly bonus. Our product manager is unwavering, however. It has dealt with this project manager before, and it knows just how to drive it away. The product manager raises itself up and puffs out its chest, trying to scare away the project manager by marking it's territory with click-through rates and loudly mentioning the CEO.
The product manager's strategy worked. At the mention of Steve, the intruding project manager turned pale and scurried away. The product manager is safe for another day in the office.
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Android switched to not allowing apps to notify you without asking first. Dunno why they didn't do it sooner.
It ends up being initially "Yes I want my app to notify me about important updates" but then the app abuses its notification privilege to start spamming you. I want my banking app to notify me when I get paid and when bills clear. I don't want my banking app to tell me about a new low interest rate I can secure on a loan.
The app at least had granular notification settings I could go in and change, but then it ends up being a periodic battle of attrition against changes to the granular notifications that are always opted in by default every time they add a new category. I turn off "offers and promotions" in an app but now it offers "recommended deals" or some garbage.
I self host calendat, password manager, an some other services because of this.
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Unless the robot has actual sentience, which I don't think will be happening any time soon and specially NOT with LLMs, I do not want it talking to me, period.
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When it asks for permission for notifications just say no instead of being that person who just presses yes/ok to everything that ever pops up.
The problem comes when the app has an actual useful purpose for notifications, but it also chooses to send this type of bullshit. So I allow notifications, and immediately uninstall any app that abuses that permission.
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This is how I feel about autocorrect changing words completely...
I'm sorry are you seriously tyring to tell me what I meant to say!? I said what I meant to say you arrogant fuck!
Seriously. I know when to use it's vs its. If I meant to type we're instead of were, I would have. Stop it!
I wish I could dial it back without turning it off completely.
I'm going to leave it for the sake of humor, but in my rant about autocorrect it didn't change tyring to trying...
It knows what I was saying about it. Lol
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I do this with Windows 11. Every time microsoft tries some bullshit "hey you need to install this" or "hey how about you use this" or some other shit, I turn off as many options I can and uninstall even more of the system out of pure hatred. I wish I could just install linux on that computer, but I can't get my two essential programs to work, so I'm stuck with the garbage I fucking hate more and more every day
I hope you can be free of it one day. I'm 4 months into Linux now and have not looked back. I was fortunate enough to not need any windows-exclusive apps.
Yeah, luckily I could switch one laptop to mint since I don't need to game or draw on it, it's been a blast!
Could you run the apps in a VM? It’s not that hard and after a while you might figure out a way to drop it entirely (also running Windows in a VM is fun, don’t give it internet acces, fuck up it’s files, tell it to piss off all kinds of ways, it’s a VM who cares)
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People…don’t just uninstall the apps when they do this. Go leave a 1-star review in whichever app store you use, and say it’s because of these nagging notifications. 1-star reviews are the weapon with which people can punish poorly behaving devs.
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LPT: If you remove any and all notifications, including from social media and messages, your life is a lot less stressful. I did it and I really enjoy. I'm not live text answering anyone, if it's urgent call me.
The thought of people potentially calling me makes me more anxious than any notification I could mute combined
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The worst is when you want to uninstall an app on your computer and it straight up starts GUILT TRIPPING YOU. Motherfucker, you're just making me MORE likely to uninstall your shit and never return. I'm 31. I don't have time for this crap, and I definitely do not have time to be given a "please don't go 🥺" by a bunch of lines of code.
most people are actually fine with this. the "i dont care" the "i dont have anything to hide" the "man i wish i could do something about the ads, oh well" crowd. eventually we have let big tech grow on us, and we have encouraged the beast the bite us as he pleases.
Most people are NOT fine with this. Most people actually hate this, and a lot of people just put up with it, some go as far as to block notifications.
I think most people have not dedicated enough brain space to the concept of software to contemplate re-configuring their notifications, but are vexed by them constantly.
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That's probably what life is like now for people who don't get all their phone apps from f-droid.
Eh, you can easily turn off notifications on the system level for apps that don’t have any business sending you pop up alerts.
I like this. Really drives home robot slavery which has been my dream for awhile. I really just need a house keeping robot. I dont need to fuck it or anything. Just all housework and repairs.
Basically a Mr. Handy! Name is sus I know, but Fallout fans will know
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I can't remember the last time I got a notification from an app. The second that shit happens I either disable or uninstall.
The ones that irritate me are to do list apps. I need checkboxes to tick off so I don't forget shit. I don't need you insinuating yourself into my life beyond that. You do not need my email address.
I used FilterBox to block spammy notifications.
You haven't blocked any spammy notifications in while.
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I’m like most people the people here….if an app doesn’t have an easy and obvious way to disable notifications on installation…ie if it “sneaks” in notifications later on…it’s gone. No chances.
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