In 96 I moved to North Carolina, and got a job stocking at a grocery store. I finished my paperwork to start work, but needed a drug test before I could be scheduled. On my way out of the store to get my drug test done I walked through the bakery and they were putting out fresh, still slightly warm, poppy seed bagels. So I grabbed one, and the next morning went for my drug test... which I failed because of opiates in my system.
this post was submitted on 06 Jan 2026
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My dad brought poppyseed muffins in to work at his bank. Corporate HQ was baffled when every single person at his branch failed their surprise drug test later that same day.
Your dad pulled off the perfect con and nobody ever found out about his extracurricular 'hobby.'
In 96 I smoked a joint in the hospital parking lot before pissing in the cup. I passed.
I think if I had gone as soon as I ate the bagel I would have been fine. But since I waited until the next day it had time to get into my system.
You never know what they're looking for. I guess they weren't too concerned about marijuana for the job I was after. I don't work for them anymore, but it did start my career track. I've never been asked to pass a drug test since.
Only place ive ever worked where it was a thing was a corporate cooking gig. (Ski Co in aspen)
First week, the chef asked who could pass a drug test. Only 2 of the old el salvadorians raised their hands. They went to the employee training seminar, where random drug tests were applied. Everyone else in the kitchen was exempted as 'mission critical.'
We kept one of those box vapes in the walk-in fridge, the kind with the wooden box you put weed into the end of the hose, and touch it to the glass heating element to use.
At one point chef was doing a walk through with someone from corporate, who saw it there, and asked what it was. With a straight face, chef told him it was a dehydrator, 'for rapidly dehydrating small amounts of herbs.' The guy looked really impressed and they continued the tour. It took me a solid 5 minutes to stop laughing and get on with my inventory.
There’s a fair number of common antidepressants that’ll pop for PCP.
And most ADHD meds will make you piss hot for amphetamines… Because ADHD meds are amphetamines.
Sort of correct, but modern drug tests can distinguish actual ADHD meds from methamphetamine reliably. When I got tested I let them know my dose and what medication and they didn't have to adjust anything at all.
I thought the standard test was 300ng/mL, and even that can give false positives if you're a prolific enough poppy-seed eater.
Testing for less than 20ng/mL is begging for false positives to occur!
Testing for less than 20ng/mL is begging for false positives to occur!
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