this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2026
932 points (98.8% liked)

Not The Onion

20844 readers
1140 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] markstos@lemmy.world 49 points 6 days ago (1 children)

"I only speak one language"... to a room full of mostly bilingual people who also live in (central or south) America. 🤦🤦🤦

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 23 points 6 days ago (1 children)

They should only speak Spanish to him just to piss him off.

[–] A_Chilean_Cyborg@feddit.cl 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Those leaders are far right bootlickers.

Including the president elect of Chile (oh god please nonono... bah he doesn't have the congress.)

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

That makes it more funny.

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 20 points 6 days ago

He only speaks War Crime.

[–] Slovene@feddit.nl 21 points 6 days ago (2 children)

What language were they speaking in England before they stole one from USA?

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 11 points 6 days ago

Before or after the French took over in 1066?

[–] ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

England? Well there was Cornish and Manx. Cornish went extinct in the 18th century but the last monoglot speaker died in the 17th century.

I am not counting Welsh since that is in Wales... And Scots Gaelic is in Scotland, its own country.

[–] Duamerthrax@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

The Scots and Irish keep Gaelic alive just to piss off the British.

[–] zalgotext@sh.itjust.works 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Well that, but also it's a really fucking cool language

[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 1 points 5 days ago

Except the orthography, which works but is still conceptually insane.

[–] 0x0@lemmy.zip 18 points 6 days ago (1 children)

They should then switch to spanish as their lingua franca for that meeting (brazillians could pull if off).
Or switch to esperanto.

[–] Blan@sh.itjust.works 7 points 6 days ago

No shit, it would be so damn funny if the whole world just switched over to Esperanto as second language, even if only to spite US and UK. Haah, one can dream the wildest things.

[–] Cybersheeper@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 6 days ago

Not beating the being stupid allegations...

[–] thedeadwalking4242@lemmy.world 13 points 6 days ago

I knew it lol I was waiting for it. I give it 6 months until the national language has been renamed to "American" through a illegal executive order

[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 3 points 5 days ago

He really is that stupid, and all that alcohol doesn't make him (or anyone) smarter.

[–] Gort@lemmy.today 7 points 6 days ago

Oh, good to know, because he can barely speak English.

"American" isn't a language, you christofascist dipshit

load more comments
view more: next ›