this post was submitted on 03 Sep 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost
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My husband giggled and said "Send that to me."
This is the highest honor a meme can receive in our home.
I see you’ve played knifey horsey before.
Introducing the Knife Horse horse knife. It's knives and horses all the way down.
I though this was a shitpost and that the handles were actually rocket engine fumes
Nah, that'd be weird.
Good point.
"Holds up to 3 knife horses"
What's that in horse knives?
We have nothing to fear from knife horse when we carry our 🎵 Knife Wrench! 🎵 (fun for kids)
Look at my horse, my horse is so stabby, give it a lick! MMM! It tastes like Damascus.
Omg core memories unlocked
Et tu, Weebl?
WHAT'S THE CHARGE? EATING A DELICIOUS KENYAN SUPPER?
Rocks back and forth for slightly too long
No.
I love the absurdity of it. Two Sentence Horror can get pretty cringey at times, although I love it when it's done well.
I put one in there that was removed because the mod was incapable of extrapolation.
It was along the lines of: " It turns out humans aren't born with souls but rather grow them. Unfortunately that was the point"
If you don't get it, think of why humans grow things. To me the realization of what the sentences are about adds to the horror. But the mod was just like "there's nothing scary about this" and told me to join the discord for advice.
Strong start, but "that was the point" adds little extra information. The subject of the point needs more exposition.
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"Unfortunately sometimes they grow too big"
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"Unfortunately Steve's was cancerous"
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"Unfortunately they need the right food"
Etc.
That said, the quality of the submission is not for the overzealous Mod to rule on. It should certainly have been posted, at the minimum for others to critique and improve.
Idk, it didn't sound scary but rather confusing. Are you implying something made us purely as a vessel/pot where they can plant a soul so that it may grow for them to use later? Like War of the Worlds (movie) style?
I prefer /r/TwoSentenceCringe. The stories are much more relatable.
Thanks for the recommendation!
Edit: you're right. It's much better when framed this way. Shame lemmy doesn't have one yet, but I doubt its own two-sentence-horror activity wouldn't be enough to sustain it.
2nd edit: There many posts there. I wonder why.
3rd edit: r/badtwosentencehorrors is pretty good:
but dad...
we firmly but politely show them the door!!!
so, we have this cool door my dad likes me to show people when they don't like steak
“No one can talk to a horse, of course.”
“Hello, I’m Mr. Ed.”
Ok I genuinely blew air out of my nose harder than usual with this one. Thanks.
Is the horse made of knives, a knife itself, or merely a horse that wields knives? This matters.
Yes.
It is a horse made of knifes, in the shape of a knife, that wields knives. It has difficulty getting through screening at airports.
I have some bad news. The horse's member is actually the knife
Make sure the knife has a hilt or the horse risks self injury. A lot of amateur killers don't know how hard it is to stab a body and their hands slip on the handle causing cuts on their hands. Rule 1 is never leave your DNA at the scene.
Source: watched Forensics Files like 3 times through.
Hoof hands(feet?) keep horse criminals safer. What I want to know is where do they keep the knife?
I think I would be so baffled by the horse talking that I wouldn't even notice the knife
That's how they get you.
When Tina Belcher becomes Teena the dark drama girlie.
Comedy horror is still horror.🤷
Funny and scary because I'm watching Willy's Wonderland right now!
Just trick the horse to fall asleep by reading from a book about compiler design and LA/LR parsers