Codpiece

Human level? That’s not setting the bar very high. Surely the aim would be to surpass human, or why bother?

I’ve been known to climb stairs on all fours on occasion. It’s still faster I swear!

As a man who got here from All, I’m not offended at all, more ashamed of my fellow men.

I have a wife and daughter, so I’m perfectly fine with this.

I can vividly remember telling my parents I was staying at a friends house, then me and that friend would go to the off license, trying very hard to look over age and not guilty, then carrying bags of cans a few miles to a friend of a friends house in the next village.

And then walking back with a hangover the next morning and hoping no parents needed to get hold of anyone.

No, real Americans would measure it in rocks, or football fields or something.

I think they’re in denial about Florida.

Two or four fingered variety?

Neither. It’s the “other” category.

Obviously this is brilliant, but one sentence made me a little sad that this isn’t obvious to a lot of people:

One senior nurse from the county, who took part in the training, said they "never realised the true impact outdoors can have on an individual and team level".

It says a lot about the state of, well, everything.

Why is “get immunised” missing from the Do list?

Maybe, but even that needs narrowing down. An American friend of mine says that the two coasts are relatively sensible and everyone in the states inbetween are utter fruitcakes.

Can you narrow that down a bit before we book the ticket?