Squeezer

I know right?! Grandpa always taught me: choose the right tool for the job.

I once enjoyed a delicious Colombian meal at a street table in Seven Sisters, north London. Shortly after the food arrived two men got into an altercation on the street, both acting like complete arseholes. One of them then disappeared off for 5 minutes and returned with a claw hammer he’d bought from a nearby hardware shop. He attacked the man half-arsedly with the claw hammer for a while then wandered off, but not far. Then the police turned up, and did a terrible job of working out who hammer man was. It was very entertaining, and the man who was being attacked with the hammer was not really injured. Dinner and a show 🤌

I’ve been #2 all day 🫥

I have a big 2012 Samsung screen which is still surprisingly good, with a Roku stick in it. Works just fine. I hope it never dies.

Mad bastards wearing puffer jackets on the central line. Also, get your hot leg off my leg.

Criminal. Should be called the minimal English. Who hurt that poor sausage.

Fried cheese. Fucking fuck yes.

We had a fish and chip shop opposite the pool. I don’t think I have eaten anything better than those salty vinegary chips, the childish exhaustion and hunger made them absolutely magical.

Nah. It’s no problem at all, we can handle nuances. If I need to be specific I use 24hr. If someone invites me over tomorrow for a cup of tea and I say I’ll be over 2ish they know what I mean. It’s all about context.

https://stoptrump.org.uk/

Madeira is pretty cool. The runway is on stilts, the approach is tricky and requires training, the cafe has a big balcony so you can watch the pilots do a tricky landing on a stilted runway with a beer.

0. Should also add the question 21- legally smoked in every conceivable fucked up place including on planes and underground trains made of wood.