half

Why YSK: There is a lot of cortisol going on right now. A lot of people are stressed, angry, and afraid. Those emotions all deserve to be felt, but over time, cortisol becomes neurotoxic (inflicting permanent damage on the hippocampus).

Oxytocin (responsible for feelings of love, attraction, affection, etc) is a perfect foil to cortisol. If you notice yourself feeling angry or afraid for an amount of time that bothers you, adding some oxytocin to the situation might be helpful.

Luckily for us, our biology makes oxytocin pretty easy to come across. Different activities work better for different people, but cuddling with a pet or loved one, watching cute cat videos, or having sex work for a lot of people.

Here are a few interesting sources for further reading, if you are curious.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33632072/ https://www.nature.com/articles/srep30187 https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5619133/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33632072/

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ca/post/31981571

Lemmy should have a community called lemmy_guess

Posts would describe bizarre situations people have found themselves in, and commenters would take a stab at what put them there.

I'm usually against subscription services, but there are a few I use that I think provide enough value to justify the cost. Are there subscriptions you think are worth the money for you?

Of course, not in a "we should generate and spread racist content" kind of way. But sometimes results are a caricature of all the stuff AI has ingested, so if its output is obviously biased, it might be a good indicator of particular ways people tend to be biased.

For example, if all of the AI-generated images for "doctor" are men, it's pretty clear the source content is biased to indicate that doctors are/should be men. It would be a lot harder to look up all of the internet's images of "doctor" to check for bias. There are probably a lot more nuanced cases where AI-generated content can make bias more apparent.

Link to original study for curious folks with access to it: https://www.pnas.org/doi/abs/10.1073/pnas.2322399121

In light of the conversations sparked by recent trans-exclusionary policy updates, we thought it would be prudent to have a wiki page to collect resources that offer support for LGBTQIA+ individuals. It can be found at https://exmormon.miraheze.org/wiki/LGBTQIA+

We started the page with a few resources, but we would love some help aggregating more resources. If you know of a high-quality LGBTQ-friendly resource, please consider updating the page or commenting/messaging it here.

And of course, the primary intention of the page is to help potentially vulnerable and marginalized people feel hope and support. Especially if you have been negatively affected by the church, you're not alone. You deserve love and support.

A friend and I have finally created a public exmormon wiki that's free for anyone to read and edit!

When I was deconstructing, I really wished there was a hub for all of the resources I needed. There is a ton of valuable content scattered around the internet, but it would have been great to have a one-stop-shop. So we made the resource I wish I had.

The (brand new) wiki at https://exmormon.miraheze.org/ is meant to accomplish this purpose. This wiki is designed to aggregate (as a community) our favorite community resources, historical and current events, essays about mormonism, and anything else that would be of value to someone experiencing a faith crisis or deconstruction.

This wiki is published in such a way that it can be available to anyone, free, forever. A nonprofit called Miraheze is generously willing to host our open-source MediaWiki site, and a plan for future-proofing the wiki is in the works (see a draft of our ideas and policies here).

As with any project like this, the greatest support needed right now is content generation and compilation. If you'd like to contribute, here are some ideas for (relatively painless) ways to do so:

• If you are posting or commenting with a very in-depth comment (with sources and meaningful insight) in this community, consider adding your remarks to the wiki as a new page (or an addition to an existing page) so that it has a longer lifespan. The creative-commons license of the wiki means there's no copyright licensing issue.

• If you've conducted research as part of your deconstruction, consider adding that research into the wiki. Pages don't need to be polished right off the bat; the important part is having resources available.

• If you have bookmarks of resources that have been valuable to you, consider adding links to the wiki.

• If you've been following a relevant news story or feel passionate about one, add a page about it starting with links to news articles.

• If you host or participate in an exmormon community (online or in-person), consider adding its details to the Communities page.

• If you are an exmormon content creator, consider adding (objective and fact-based) details about where people can find your content.

• If you've wanted to write your own "CES Letter"-type publication but haven't out of fear of judgment or lack of technical know-how, consider adding that content to the wiki.

Please feel free to contribute without fear. Just like other wikis, it's free and pretty simple to add and edit contents, and it's really hard for a public user to permanently damage the wiki. If you have questions or concerns, I'm active on Lemmy and my wiki talk page.

Of course, this wiki isn't meant to replace this community or any other resource. Rather, it's meant to give a long lifespan and improved visibility/accessibility to content that can support someone in their faith journey.

Thanks for your attention and time, and thanks for contributing to the wholesome community we have here. <3

Why YSK: some very dangerous people and organizations use love bombing as a strategy to manipulate and recruit people. Love bombing is often an early warning sign for a traumatizing relationship, so it's helpful to be able to spot the signs.

What it Is

Essentially, it's when someone showers you with love and attention. It often includes a lot of reassurance that you belong with someone or in a group. It can include gifts, flattery, praise, and it usually includes a lot of excitement about your future together or with a group.

The catch is that the love bomb goes away, and you become devalued after the love bomb. This is usually followed by a "discard phase", where if you try to confront the behavior, you are rejected and made to feel at fault. After you've become upset by this, they will often start the cycle again to keep your loyalty.

There are some really key warning signs to look out for:

1. They give you gifts, especially random gifts
2. They want all of your attention
3. They're desperate for commitment from you
4. You feel pressure to not tell them no
5. They constantly talk about how much they love you, how special you are, etc.
6. You feel flattered but uneasy around them
7. They want to know a lot about you very quickly
8. They emphasize how much better everything is when you are with them

Where can I spot it?

Love bombing is very common in abusive and manipulative relationships. It's also often noticeable in cult recruiting, when members are trained to shower you with love and affection.

What can I do about it?

It can be good to seek help from a mental health professional if you're already hurt from the effects of love bombing. If you're in crisis, consider contacting a local crisis or emergency line.

If you notice signs of love bombing, there are some strategies that often work to keep people safe:

• set firm boundaries early
• stay grounded (i.e., take their praise with a grain of salt)
• ask, "what might they want from this interaction?"
• end a relationship if it's not working
• give as little information out as possible at the start of a relationship
• ask an objective 3rd party how they feel about your relationship with this person or group

More resources

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/love-bombing https://www.choosingtherapy.com/love-bombing/

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/17585420

So. Without trauma dumping, I'll simply say my dad is a bad dad. What's a father's day gift that says "you're dead to me, but I'm still doing things to keep drama at bay"?

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/15464125

"Thought-Terminating Cliches"