mydoomlessaccount

Those 6 accursed words: "if you would only apply yourself."

I don't know what I've done to deserve this, but I seem to do it a lot

At my job, I quite often see "Monday, Wednesday, Friday" abbreviated to MWF.

I read it in the voice once. It has proven to be the gift that never stopped giving.

It's just an unending cycle of collecting rings and then losing them all when something comes out of nowhere and knocks you on your ass.

Now that I think about it, making them rings was kind of a heavy-handed choice..

God, that must be so embarrassing

But the desk blocks me from accessing my penis????

What a coincidence! I call mine The Crowdpleaser

If her friends don't cum- and if they don't cum- well they're no friends of mine

I like to spend all day at work thinking about how much fun I'm going to have playing a certain game when I get home.

Then, when I finally make it home and sit down in front of my computer, I'll "get to it in a minute" for the next 3 to 4 hours until suddenly it's time to eat and go to bed. Repeat 5 days a week.

After all that adventure, he's gotta be tired. I'd say the next move should be heading back to the White House. :)

They turned Jaco Pastorius into an anime girl 😔

I relate to the baby that was apparently too ugly to eat