Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
view the rest of the comments
so true, and such a good example.
Personally as a kid I never exercised unless forced to (e.g. the annual 1 mile run in gym class) and didn't enjoy sports, even before I realized I was trans.
This was for so many reasons, too. For example with swimming, not wearing long-sleeves & pants was unbearable in social situations as a kid, let alone taking my shirt off & wearing swim trunks around peers.
I also had very poor body coordination / awareness ("proprioception"), and frequently was injured when I would play.
(I was hit in the head by balls so many times in sports it became a running joke with friends and family - I have distinct memories of having painful experiences being hit in the head when playing basketball, baseball, and kickball, some of these happening more than once.)
As an adult I learned coping strategies, and I adapted to living as the wrong gender and dissociating from the body. Looking back, it was dysfunctional the way I used my self-loathing and gender dysphoria as tools to push myself to endure physical suffering that wasn't safe or healthy. I also had a hard time gauging my body's needs and injured myself many times, and I now have life-long conditions as a result.
I have heard similar stories from other trans women IRL about not being able to read the body and injuring themselves, and about poor body coordination / proprioception. There is also just the obvious discomfort of the way sports puts you into your body in a social context, and for trans women the way sports is male-coded and all the complicated social dynamics around being "athletic" or into sports as being masculine.
What were your experiences, and do you have any advice for trans people wanting to be healthy with movement?
The proprioception thing is interesting because it's also linked to things like ADHD and autism along with other sensory processing difficulties.
For me, my own poor proprioception actually feeds into my dysphoria on its own because it feels like somebody hit me with the Scale tool in Blender and added like 2 inches to all my bodily dimensions. I can't tell you how many times I've just barely smacked my head or hands on things or kicked furniture and how much frustration it has caused me with this damned flesh prison.
yes, it wasn't until I transitioned and read all the studies about shared genetic causes of gender dysphoria and autism, and the high overlap between the two that I finally took seriously the feedback I had been getting my whole life that I might be autistic - so my own proprioception issues might also be linked to neurodivergence. Estrogen seemed to help a little bit with my proprioception, but I am still clumsy and my spouse has noted that it hasn't been fixed by transition.
I do feel like you that my body just feels too large, and I do think that's part of why I run into things - the hormones haven't fixed that, so maybe that's a life sentence, unfortunately. And "damned flesh prison" is pretty much how I would describe my body since I was maybe 15 - 17 years old? But hey, still cis tho.
Would be a great idea imho to start organising queer&ally sport groups.
Regular swimming sessions in groups, perhaps?
that is a great idea! Rent out a pool or field, provide a safe space for trans participation in sports - I love it!