this post was submitted on 20 Jul 2025
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I have a Belgian Malinois, which, if you're not aware, is basicallythe breed of dog used by military and police that aren't German Shepherds. They are absolute maniacs of dogs, full of all kinds of prey drive and herding instincts and such that have long-since been bred out of your average family pet.
So for a while when I still had a Facebook I followed a couple of Malinois pages to help me better understand what was going on in my dog's head.
Now some malinois owners are great, they understand the reasons why their dogs are the way they are and understand how to manage them properly.
Others are absolute assholes who just wanted the really cool supersoldier dog that can run up walls and eat bad guys, and don't really do anything to channel that energy properly
I remember one post in particular of some guy's dog "playing" with a turtle, picking it up, throwing it around, etc.
I'm a dog owner, I've at times dabbled in hunting, I'm an environmentalist and conservationist, I know what sort of laws are out there and what is and isn't allowed. And people are stupid and make entirely too much information about themselves available online.
So I could see from this guy's profile what state (and in fact what city he was in, what high school he went to what company he works for, etc.)
And I could easily Google what the laws in that state are
And lol and behold, allowing your dog to harass wildlife is not allowed in that state. There were fines, potentially prison time, the officials could even take your dog and have them destroyed over this. I think it might have even been legal, maybe even encouraged, in that state for anyone witnessing this happening to just shoot your dog on the spot.
I of course wasn't about to report this guy over this, I didn't want his dog put down or anything, I just wanted him to be a better, more responsible dog owner, so I pointed this out in the comments, that were, up until that point, mostly just other assholes jerking each other off over how cool malinois are.
He, of course, quickly took the past down after that.
But not before a whole bunch of people got really pissy about me looking at his profile (to see the information about himself that he made publicly available I guess?) and taking the time to Google the relevant laws in his state so that I could point out exactly why what he was doing wasn't just morally wrong but actually illegal.
There were disturbingly few people commenting on that post who were simply angry that this jackass was letting his dog fuck with a turtle.
As an aside, my dog is a rare "lazy" malinois. She's still more energetic and driven than pretty much any other dog I've ever met, there's a part of her that definitely wants to eat someone's face, but she's content to sleep on the couch all day instead. She definitely would chase some rabbits, deer, foxes, squirrels, etc. given the chance (I don't give her the chance,) and she's never seen a turtle, but she seems to like just sniffing and occasionally licking frogs and toads (I try not to let her, but she occasionally finds them before I do on our walks, the amphibians seem mildly annoyed by this, but not enough to hop away from her, and I make sure to get her away from them ASAP so that they can continue frogging undisturbed.)
Your dog is chill because of the regular frog licking, having achieved inner dog balance through psychedelics lol
Am I allowed to steal "lol and behold"? I want this to become a thing.
By all means, please capitalize on my typo. It's got a nice ring to it.
Boss at work and his main lackey both got malanois recently, and trained them to attack, but trained them poorly, so now they'll do the dog equivalent of "two for flinching" regularly. I always just say "the fuck you want?" all mean and loud and they back off, for now...
I'm not looking forward to when I have to mace one of these little cunts if I have to. Like I get it, they're just "protecting their boss," but also this is a warehouse, I'm literally required to be here, and if you bite me for needing the pallet jack 5ft from my boss I'm gonna have to protect myself so I can make it to the lawsuit.
Next time, report them.