this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2024
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

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[–] Moss@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm very afraid of changing my presentation because I'm afraid other people won't like it. Which I know is stupid but I really want to avoid that. When I have changed things in the past I've always felt like I needed a big justification and a big build up to actually doing it.

I wanna dye my hair white. I've wanted to for years but have been afraid of other people not liking it. Why must I rely on other people for validation why am I like this

[–] good_girl@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Gods I'm the same way, even though I've come out to some friends, I'm deathly afraid to change my presentation until I can somehow 'prove' myself. In my mind, that way is to have a 'presentable' voice and hide my facial hair shadow (or be rid of it completely), and until those things happen I'll be constantly thinking about it.

Luckily I don't externalize these feelings and I'm incredibly jealous of the trans people who can socially present the way they want to without fear of judgement, but we're always harshest on ourselves right?

[–] Moss@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago

I'm deathly afraid to change my presentation until I can somehow 'prove' myself.

This is it exactly for me. I always feel like I need to earn a change. Like, I'll change when I'm skinnier, when I have more money, when I have better clothes, or whatever

[–] Moss@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

UPDATE: i cut my hair this morning. im happy with it. feels good