this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 79 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Too stupid for the military is incredibly stupid

[–] ped_xing@hexbear.net 39 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Permanently disqualified. How in the.

[–] booty@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago

Someone in the reddit thread guessed that maybe he answered something in a way that's not just wrong but like super illegal in a "you're stupid enough to be more of a liability than a help" kind of way. Like outright saying "yes i want to go overseas to murder people" sort of answers.

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago

Being low test scores isnt a permanent disqualifier, they can waiver you in if you ride the line. something medically most likely. Probably too much water in the brain

[–] Tunnelvision@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

That’s going into bro REALLY shouldn’t have had access to a gun territory even by American capitalist standards.

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 72 points 1 year ago (5 children)

USMC minimum score: 31 or higher (out of 100%)

Sample questions: https://www.officialasvab.com/applicants/sample-questions/

He has to be fully illiterate. 31 is such a low bar that it's reading a paragraph and doing addition/subtraction/division/multiplication.

[–] Bay_of_Piggies@hexbear.net 35 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

I know nothing about cars and electrical really, and I'm pretty bad at math and I got at least 75% of the questions correct.

Did he even finish high school? He was 17 when he killed those two people, and I doubt he has done much learning since then.

[–] VILenin@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

He can live the rest of his life mooching off Chud welfare, why would this glorified nazi thug put any effort into anything ever again?

[–] Philosoraptor@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No. He dropped out in middle school. His trial team had to "help" him quickly complete a GED so they could paint him as a promising young man who just got caught in a bad situation. He is, according to everyone who has spent any time around him, aggressively stupid.

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[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

Do they really use multiple choice for math questions in US education? That makes it very easy to guess the answers for some questions without fully performing any calculations.

Also I've answered some of the questions on that website and I haven't got a single one wrong yet. Is this really all you need, along with basic fitness, to become a marine? Because if so, I understand where all the stereotypes about them being crayon eaters come from.

Okay I got my first question wrong. I answered with backsaw for the question: "Which handsaw should be used to make a rough cut with the grain in a thick board?" Correct answer was ripsaw. My hopes and dreams of being a US Marine are over😭.

[–] marxisthayaca@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Bit idea, your score is so high it activates some sort of "Marine Prophecy Lore" about the chosen one, and you just keep trying to explain that multiple choice helps you guess, ala idiocracy.

[–] huf@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

nah, they probably also reject people who score too high. they want that sweet 31%-60% range.

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This that genius marine? Man, I thought his head would be bigger. Looks like a damn peanut.

[–] BountifulEggnog@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I never saw multiple choice math problems in class/homework, but it seemed common for standardized testing like this, where only a small writing section would be manually graded. Everything else (on those tests) was multiple choice or similar.

[–] Tunnelvision@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Damn was standardized testing in the US pushed so it would be an easier transition when you go to the ASVAB? I’m kinda having a revelation rn frfr thonk

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago

It was also initially adopted as part of a pre-(or post, can't remember) WW1 scheme to sort out the bunker kids from the "more expendable" trench kids

[–] VILenin@hexbear.net 15 points 1 year ago

The primary goal of standardized testing companies, like every other company, is profit, so they avoid having to spend money on someone manually grading something as much as possible.

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (5 children)

You need to be able to run a 3 mile in a short period of time, i dont think most of us can do that here.

I think you need to spend more time around american kids who arent the rich, white ones on reddit or here. They've been failed by our country and society so bad.

[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

It's three miles in under 28 minutes on flat ground for the minimum required score, so nine minutes per mile pace will get you there comfortably. This is along with 4 pull ups or chin ups, and a one minute ten second plank.

I think most of us under 28 years old could achieve that if we trained for it, it's not like joining the Navy SEALS or anything like that.

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

If you are diligent and smart enough to train to get your run time and fitness to that point youre likely diligent and smart enough to pass an easy military test.

The people who are trying to join are not that and thats what im trying to point out.

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[–] BobDole@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So, the ASVAB is a 99 point scale. The number commonly given is the AFQT number, which is a representation of the percentile at which you score. In this example, that would be the 31st percentile, ie scores less than 69% of people who have taken the test, with the high score possible being the 99th percentile, ie scores better than than 99% of test takers. Now, the AFQT is based on a formula instead of actually keeping a running tally of everyone’s scores and comparing every new test, so it’s an approximation

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[–] VILenin@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago

His entire life he has expected everything to be handed to him on a silver platter, and having no qualifications whatsoever works just fine for him considering he's set for life on ChudFundMe

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago

Ive heard people getting single digits its worse than you think

[–] AntiOutsideAktion@hexbear.net 71 points 1 year ago (2 children)

holy hell he's too dumb for the marines

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Its a wonder that he still knows how to breathe

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

The standard for all the branches if pretty uniform also failing the asvab isnt uncommon because how fucked education and our society is in the US. I know were dunking but its legitimately a problem and we should pity that so many kids are even too stupid to join the military

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 52 points 1 year ago

Bro cant even be a crayon eater wtf

[–] buh@hexbear.net 47 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 38 points 1 year ago

Looking into it.

[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 28 points 1 year ago

There are some real dumb mfers in the military that make you wonder how the fuck did they get in and goddamn he's even dumber than them holy shit I'm dying.

Honestly they should let him barely pass so he can get chewed up and washed out by the marines for the giggles.

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 27 points 1 year ago

I knew someone who did recruiting and they said that kids would pretty regularly not pass the practice test and/or get single digit scores. They also said that every now and then theyd get someone who couldnt read at all.

[–] dkr567@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Didn't know it's actually possible for a person to be too fucking dumb for amerikkka military considering i met one of the dumbest fucking person (an American GI) when I was visiting occupied part of Korea long time ago.

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

One of the biggest problems the military has is that too many kids fail the ASVAB, I GUESS thats what happens when you defund education to enrich the elites oops

[–] D61@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

or, you know, why take a test seriously that doesn't count for an actual grade?

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

ASVAB is a military test they use to see what jobs youre qualified for and if you meet minimum standards

[–] D61@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

Yeah, I know, I've taken the test. It was mandatory in USA's public schools in the 90's. Probably still is.

You get nothing for taking a test if you don't plan on going into the military. It doesn't count as a grade for a class, you get no cash from the recruiter who brings the tests for each correct answer.

There's literally no reason to try to make a good grade on this test for the majority of people who aren't sitting in a recruiter's office unless you just like having your phone ring off the hook to tell the recruiters to go fuck themselves.

Fill in the dots, make a pretty picture and take a nap until time is called.

[–] ComradePupIvy@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

it is not longer manditory. it is only heeavily encurraged at every turn. Source... I graduated without taking it

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[–] Judge_Juche@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Lol, the ASVAB is like a basic literacy test, and even then the military gives out frequent waivers for failing it.

I read on Twitter, so a completely unsubstantiated rumor, that he acutally got disqualified becuase he sent his recruiter a video of him disassembling and reassembling an AR which the recruiter found threatening.

[–] buh@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I read on Twitter, so a completely unsubstantiated rumor, that he acutally got disqualified becuase he sent his recruiter a video of him disassembling and reassembling an AR which the recruiter found threatening.

He was probably expecting the recruiter to react like that drill instructor in forrest gump

[–] SSJ2Marx@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Notably, Forrest Gump was just good at assembling the weapon quickly, he didn't say a bunch of unhinged shit while he did it.

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[–] booty@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago

Yo I didn't even know that was possible. That's genuinely impressive. Rittenhouse wtf are you doing you could've been the world's purest himbo but instead you had to go and be a fascist bootlicking murderer

[–] charlie@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

His test score was far below the required minimum and was permanently disqualified from entering the USMC.

Not like the ASVB means anything, it’s a bullshit test literally designed off of bullshit IQ tests. The marines do have the lowest entry requirements though.

[–] Mokey@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You cant be perm disqualified for low asvab test, thats fake news. He might of cheated or had a dq'd medical issue while happening to have a low asvab

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[–] blobjim@hexbear.net 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Tabitha@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] Gay_Tomato@hexbear.net 30 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

What in the world is all this? https://twitter.com/DaveHan06/status/1774751376889057282 He helped give kyle literally everything he could dream of to start a new life which signficantly helped him win the trial and now he's shocked-pikachu that he used this dream makeover to become a grifter???

lenin-rage honk-enraged guts-rage

This deserves a post of its own holy shit.

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[–] Elon_Musk@hexbear.net 11 points 1 year ago
[–] tamagotchicowboy@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

The fuck? He's going to be the standard boot licking chud in 20 years saying 'yep I woulda joined but '. I expected it to be out of pure cowardice and realization that the world he's going into may shoot back at his pampered imperialist ass, not mere shitty education.

[–] SSJ2Marx@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago

No fucking way. This has to be fake.

[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

damn, he coulda been the next "American Sniper."

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