this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2024
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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Enjoy this low bandwidth meme

top 21 comments
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[–] dojan@lemmy.world 26 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Police unsettled when homicide victim speaks up. Shot on sight.

[–] Che_Donkey@lemmy.ml 12 points 11 months ago

...and their dog

[–] spizzat2@lemm.ee 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Private investigator and [pie maker](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ned_(Pushing_Daisies)) seen leaving the scene.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Do you see what the title of this article is implying?? Dead people rarely talk to police but SOMETIMES THEY DO 😳👻

[–] Trigger2_2000@sh.itjust.works 3 points 11 months ago

Hell Boy got them to talk!

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 15 points 11 months ago

The level of necromancy skills among today’s detectives leaves a lot to be desired

[–] IphtashuFitz@lemmy.world 13 points 11 months ago

I’d consider a friend of mine a victim. His wife was murdered in a home invasion gone terribly wrong. My friend was half way across the country when the murder occurred, and yet since lots of murders involve spouses the cops focused on him at first. Eventually it was discovered a handyman they had hired was the true killer and my friend had nothing to do with it.

Yet another example of why you never talk to the police without your lawyer present…

[–] Kalkaline@leminal.space 7 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I imagine they're talking about people who have a threat on their life and don't talk to the police prior to the final incident. Think stalkers, abusive partners, etc.

[–] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 15 points 11 months ago

Don't make excuses for poor writing.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Aw dangit, you made this hilarious article make sense and almost took the funny away.

[–] Zoomboingding@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

We need to defund militarization of police and support funding for séances.

[–] satanmat@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

Torchwood had no comment on the matter. Cpt Harkness simply laughed at us.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 4 points 11 months ago

Link rot is real sadly but here is the closest I could find to the original article and it’s just the same publication referencing how it got onto The Tonight Show.

https://www.lehighvalleylive.com/entertainment-general/2009/03/an_expresstimes_headline_makes.html

Basically the gist is that some victims don’t die immediately after getting homicide-d and so have time to speak to the police.

[–] norimee@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

There are just not enough skillles mediums and necromancers around. What can you do?

[–] tacosanonymous@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There’s a real stigma about being a homicide victim.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Yeah, the stigma of becoming mute & dumb after being murdered.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Having played the 1:1 simulation of police work that is Disco Elysium, I beg to differ.

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Thanks for reminding me I need to finally play it.

[–] thenextguy@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

how closely that word resembles RELIGION and I had to do a doubletake,

if this article was categorized under RELIGION, it would be about murder victims speaking from the great beyond.

[–] thenextguy@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

"You stole my Jesus fish!"