this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2025
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 112 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Jackhammer_Joe@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Hey, that's u/Striking_Analysis656!

[–] HairyHarry@lemmy.world 69 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (6 children)

Stupid question.

But whats the fish with the rather mediocre sized mouth and no teeth?

[–] kambusha@sh.itjust.works 33 points 3 months ago

Asking for a friend

[–] GargleBlaster@lemmy.world 14 points 3 months ago

I'm looking for a fish wish a below average mouth full of teeth.

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Your local pet store probably has some bettas for you

Perfect fit in more ways than one

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[–] LookBehindYouNowAndThen@lemmy.world 42 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] criitz@reddthat.com 8 points 3 months ago

Never has this been more appropriate

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 37 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Ah, that legendary character

[–] ComicalMayhem@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] somerandomperson1231@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Code Geass. The text is supposedly from a bad fan translation.

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

"Supposedly" implies it could be legit.

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[–] SomethingBlack@lemmy.world 22 points 3 months ago

Asking for a friend. The friend is his penis

[–] BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world 21 points 3 months ago (2 children)

This makes me think the idea my coworker and I had to start our own business would be really profitable. We both have experience with mold making. And sex toys are a huge industry. What is an underrepresented category we could make a market for? Fish.

Fuck-A-Fish we would call it. Fleshlite-esque fish to bang. All different kinds. Realistically modeled and painted. And we would have a whole line of products to use with them. Like Love Chum, a textured lubricant.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

Fishlite was right there dude.

[–] _____@lemm.ee 20 points 3 months ago

next question: how can I remove a cylinder from a fish

[–] vvilld@lemmy.world 20 points 3 months ago

He's just going to insert a cylinder into the fish. Note, the cylinder canNOT be cut. That's why he wants no teeth.

[–] DudeImMacGyver@kbin.earth 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I heard he fucked an ostrich

[–] CuddlyCassowary@lemmy.world 18 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Heard it was a sick ostrich

[–] swab148@lemm.ee 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It'd take at least two people to fuck an ostrich

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)
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[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 3 months ago

Please do not the fish

[–] billiam0202@lemmy.world 13 points 3 months ago
[–] Meron35@lemmy.world 13 points 3 months ago (6 children)

Cant believe im posting this.

Octopuses do not have any bones with the exception of their beaks. so if you are responsible and depraved enough to be literally the life support of your 8 limbed friend, you can debeak it like how you'd declaw a cat and then push your member into it's feed chute.

You can then let it subsist on your baby batter.

The Octopus is smart. Very smart. It will learn that without it's beak, it cannot feed on anything else but your human seed that has to be milked from you.

Every morning, you will feel your clothes slide off and a damp weight on your lower half.

The sensation creeps up your body until most of the jiggly mass has enveloped the entire length. It will start pumping as fast as it can for it is hungry.

The animal gyrates its empty stomach and the folds of its brain rubbing on your glans, begging for nutrition.

You climax and give the marine creature's breakfast. The pumping slows down but doesn't stop to milk out the last few drops of its meal.

Looking into its yellow animal eyes, it looks back with a thousand-yard stare. This will be routine for all of its meals for the rest of it's 3-5 years on this god forsaken planet.

[–] LaoisheFu@lemmy.world 20 points 3 months ago

I can't believe I just read this. And don't want to ask where it came from

[–] Lucky_777@lemmy.world 11 points 3 months ago

Found The Deep

[–] serenissi@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

New tentacle kink dropped.

[–] BlueLineBae@midwest.social 11 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I gotta tell you, I have 0% motivation to click that link and watch that YouTube video.

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 3 points 3 months ago

Same, gotta explain it because I'm not watching someone fuck a fish, then get his dick ripped off.

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[–] Underwaterbob@lemm.ee 8 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Probably some kind of baleen whale. Really don't want to stick your dick in that.

[–] pumpkinseedoil@mander.xyz 6 points 3 months ago (2 children)
[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 7 points 3 months ago

I don't think the guy looking to buy a fish to fuck will care to much about the taxonomy.

[–] Underwaterbob@lemm.ee 4 points 3 months ago

Haha! Derpy doo. Brain not present.

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[–] rothaine@lemm.ee 7 points 3 months ago

Eww salmonella dick

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 6 points 3 months ago

The rumors about Troy McClure are true!

[–] aeternum@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 3 months ago

quagmire, is that you?

[–] Num10ck@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

gives new meaning to upscaling.

[–] Kaput@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago
[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

TBF he might just want a pet without risk of finger loss.

[–] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 3 months ago

you know what that means!

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